Journey on

Reflection

2011-12-26T02:35:00.002+08:00

The year came, the year is almost at the end for year 2011. What a wonderful year it has been with ups and downs. Hubs and I have experienced one of the most challenging years of our lives and busyness was to say the least, one of the hugest challenges for us.

While the carols ring in the distance and bells toll for the coming new year, let us quieten our hearts down snd start to reflect on the great, the good and the goshes of year 2011.

Cheers to all!

Back!

2011-05-07T15:15:00.000+08:00

I'm now back from the hedges! Wait for more posts!

Change for Malaysia!!!

2010-05-24T13:58:00.002+08:00

Quoted from the KOMAS website:

"The 12th General Election did not only result in the change of government in four states or the lost of Barisan Nasional two-thirds majority in Parliament. It brought along many practices never seen before in the government system. In Selangor, a body under the state assembly was formed to monitor the use of public funds.

In the federal Parliament the increasing presence of opposition representatives has resulted in more serious debates. Today, UMNO and Barisan Nasional has started speaking the language of change. However, the real reform process is not as easy as voting on polling day.

This documentary discusses the meaning behind those promised changes. Info on KOMAS - komas.org

A Big Pictures production for Pusat KOMAS.
36 mins.
Director: Anna Har
Producer: Brenda Danker
Executive Producer: Jerald Joseph
Editor: Chi Too

Pilihan Raya umum ke-12 bukan setakat melibatkan perubahan empat kerajaan negeri atau kehilangan kuasa dua pertiga Barisan Nasional di Parlimen. Ia membawa kepada pelbagai amalan yang tidak wujud dan namkapasing sebelum inin dapat dirasakan oleh rakyat buat julung kalinya. Di negeri Selangor satu badan di bawah Dewan Negeri ditubuhkan untuk memantau perbelanjaan dana awam.

Di peringkat Persekutuan , Parlimen kini nampak lebih serius dengan kehadiran wakil pembangkang. Hari ini, Barisan Nasional yang keras kepala sebelum 8 Mac lalu, juga sudah mula bertutur dalam bahasa prubahan. Bagaimanapun, perubahan yang sebenar bukanlah semudah membuang undi pada pilihan raya.

Selepas Tsunami is also available in Mandarin, Tamil, and Iban language.
Please contact Pusat KOMAS +603-7968 5415 to purchase the DVDs. Email: info@komas.org"

Selepas Tsunami (After the Tsunami) from Pusat KOMAS on Vimeo.

2 months on

2010-01-26T00:19:00.005+08:00

We go through life cruising and not knowing where we are going. Just floating through the streams, rivers, and waves of life and taking them as they come.

I have a confession to make. Sometimes we take wrong turns, U-turn at the wrong junctions, rough bumps and holes along the way. I did too.

It has been a soul-searching 2 months, starting from my birthday, coinciding with hubs' and my travels in Hanoi, through to reading John Maxwell's Roadmap to Success, purchasing our [invaluable] whiteboard to jot down notes, verbalize vision and mission of our lives and draw mindmaps, talking to wiser ones who've eaten more salt than our rice. Most of all, sensing His presence in the incidences and situations of our lives, hearing His voice in the quiet of our conversations, and experiencing His faithful hand in our simple existence.

We need to take time to assess, evaluate and chart out again our path. It has been a fruitful two months to make decisions, position priorities, rest and recharge, and take next steps.

Cheers to the new year!

Goodbye...

2009-11-02T18:47:00.002+08:00

... to our little terrapin. He died.. I'm not sure what happened to him, but I suspect he was not well.

I brought him in the car with us on our trip up north, and hubs commented that I'm bringing him for a holiday. Upon arrival, I realize that he's stiff as. A twinge of sadness, I felt.

Let's try again.

I am the judge. Not.

2009-10-04T23:29:00.003+08:00

We often judge others for who they are, or not are. Somehow, our judgments are found to be baseless upon finding the truth. More commonly, we never choose to seek the truth for the comfort of believing our preconceived ideas and judgments.

We all make judgments and conclusions about things, situations, and people. I've been found guilty of this as well. I've been made to be aware of my judgments and assumptions of people and situations, through my practicums' supervision when I was a finishing my Masters. How often I was found to be making assumptions and jumping to conclusions, and worse still, verbalizing them without a thought. How often, I was also shown to be wrong. I still am shown to be wrong, countless times.

I try as best as I can to give people the benefit of the doubt. I try to listen and to put myself in the other person's shoes. I believe everyone has a story that led to their behaviour; whether conscious or unconscious is a very different issue altogether. I sometimes fail. But I try. And try. And try.

Shall we try all together?

Missing again

2009-08-27T12:29:00.003+08:00

So we've moved house, and the little terror terrapin also managed to catch us in time before we left him for good. He lost himself again in our new home. I looked at his tank yesterday and realized he was missing, again!

Guess where I found him? (I found out it's a 'him' already; my friend taught me how to identify the gender, teeheehee; thanks woman!)

He was found behind the TV, again! He truly loves making dramas, man. Drama mama. I mean, drama papa.

Lost in his own home

2009-08-16T22:27:00.005+08:00

Jaeson's uncle gave us a little terrapin, and this little terror [pun intended], got lost in our, in his, own home; not once, but twice. The first time he was missing, I found him behind our TV console. Tsk tsk. I don't know what he was trying to do. Making a movie by himself, for us to view later? This time, he was lost for such a looooonnnggg time, we thought he was gone forever. We had moved to our new home for two weeks already, and popped by our old place to clean up and get more stuff, and suddenly the little fela appears on the lower level of our old living room, sitting among the boxes! Ready for us to pick him up? Beats me maannnnn.

I don't know its gender, but I don't know why I called it a him automatically. Heh heh.

The month in short

2009-08-07T23:55:00.004+08:00

The month has been eventful!

First off, I convocated!!! Woohoooooo. It was a long, long, emotionally fulfilling, but also draining. Roller coaster of some sort. Though an academic exercise of gaining my masters, but it was more an emotional thing than a mental thing for me. It was easier listening and learning. But it was downright tough being faced with my weaknesses and my "hang-ups" when my programme confronted me with them. But God's grace has been with me. Thank the Lord for all support from family and friends.

Secondly, moving house! We are now officially neighbours with Unc Ven and Aunty Sze, very good friends of ours. Quite crazy that we have tonnes of stuff. Sis-in-law came to visit us a few days ago and she was quite surprised at the amount of stuff we've got. We've got lots and lots of books. Hubs was telling me that we're pretty nerdy people. I can see my sisters nodding in agreement. Hauhauhauha. The house is still a mess with most of our boxes in the study. We've still got things to move from our old place, but we've pretty much moved most of our stuff already. Our new place is more spacious, with more open area. One downside of our place is that our neighbour somehow, looovvesss pouring urine every single night, I think on his plants (I'm not sure though). We are not sure which neighbour in particular.. Sigh. If you do come visiting at night, you'll smell urea. If you don't, it's your lucky day!

Thirdly, it's been a sick month for me with going to the doctor's 3 times this month with different ailments. How sick is that! I'm now typing this with an upset tummy; feeling nausea and some churning in the tummy. No, I'm not preggers. More yoghurt and apple cider for both of us. Hubs is also down with the flu, jangkit from me la..

Running off now!

Maraysians oso spiak Engreesh orkeiii

2009-07-26T14:48:00.005+08:00

So hubs and I were in JB last night for his granny's birthday dinner, and right after we went out with sister-in-law and her fiancee and mum-in-law for some drinks. We parked our car outside the cafe and were on the way crossing the street when a man and a lady, together with a boy approached us.

The conversation we were engaged in last night:

Man: (In Mandarin) Errr, excuse me, this place here, must put parking coupon or not?
Hubs: (In Mandarin) I'm not too sure, maybe not, coz it's after the cut-off time already. I think it should be okay not to put the coupons.
Hub's phone rings, he picks the call and I'm left with the man, and another lady and young man.
Man: (Looks around)
Me: (In English) I think you don't have to, because the timing for parking charges is from morning till 6pm. Now is already 10.30pm, so shouldn't be a problem. It's quite different across different towns in Malaysia, but I suppose that's the way it is in JB. Don't worry, you can park your car for free. You're not local? From.......?
Lady: .....Singapore (smiles)
Man: WAH!!!! EH! You can speak English ah!!!! Wow, so fluent ah! You surely must also be from Singapore, right!
Me: No la! I'm Malaysian, I'm local. Heeeyyyyyy, Malaysians also can speak English fluently you know!
Man: Ya I know, but your's ah, very very fluent la!! This young man here, cannot speak so well, he's from ___ (another Malaysian town).
Me: It depends la...

We always are stereotyped to not know how to spiak Engreesh.

Excuse me sir, Malaysia Boleh!!!

The things people wear

2009-07-24T09:49:00.004+08:00

"Rejection stimulates me". I saw that on someone's t-shirt just the other day. I really wonder whether people think before they pull on another t-shirt to themselves. I've also seen "I'm a trash mouth". ??!!!?!?

Sometimes baffling to think that people actually would put on something that doesn't make sense, and to top it off, you're baring the message to the whole wide world. So pelik mannn...

If the fellow wearing "rejection stimulates me" really does mean the phrase he's wearing on his chest, he must be a real poor thing to actually live with that type of life.

Sigh..

I miss...

2009-07-15T00:38:00.007+08:00

him.

He's away again for work overseas. Our home is so quiet, so empty without him. I escape to dad and mum's when he's away. Too much too handle if I'm there alone. I tell other people that it's safer to stay at my parents, which is true, but also because if I'm in our home, alone, it gets kinda sad coz hubs is not around in our home.

He makes me laugh, even while chatting online while he's away.
He makes my day.
He protects me.
He loves me.
He talks and listens to me.
He eats my cooking.
He makes me feel like there's no other place better than being with him.
He is comfortable being silent with me.
He likes to walk in our garden.
He looks at me with love.
He plays songs for me on the guitar.
He is my best friend.
My companion.

I miss my friend, so much. Just sharing everyday life together, it's priceless.

But he's coming back, soon. Very soon!

In action again

2009-07-15T00:30:00.002+08:00

It's been way too long that I've left running. Read something on self-discipline few days ago, and I know, I've been so slack in that area. Procrastinating is such a bad habit of mine.

So, I got back into my running gear and went up the hills. Yesterday and today...my butt hurts now. So does... But my mind is clearer, I'm more resolute, I'm thinking faster, not to mention, I feel more disciplined. Heh heh. But in all honesty, running is not my favourite sport. I used to sprint, but not long distance runs. It stuffs me out! But I do running to train my mind; to do something I don't really like doing trains self-discipline. It's a mental thing for me. The good thing is that it keeps me somewhat fit. That's good encouragement despite not enjoying the sport, ain't it? :)

Gotta keep this going!

Down memory lane

2009-07-10T17:25:00.005+08:00

Browsing through Jo's lappie, I found photos from my 25th birthday, pictures which I'd forgotten about.

Hubby was away overseas, he wasn't around to celebrate my birthday, but my family was around, and we were in JB that weekend, so we had a lil celebration in the hotel room..

We aren't exactly the creamy-cakey sorta people, so mum suggested buying a Batman, or Superman, a lil kiddy 1-portion cake, and we were having such a laugh over it. Well, we did, and had a great time just being with each other. We have a tradition of praying for the birthday person whenever her birthday comes round, and it was the same last year.

It cracked me up when I chanced upon the pics just now, but really, it brings back such good memories. Memories of knowing that my family is there and that I belong to such a great family, having parents that have been passing on great legacies to us girls; I'm so grateful for family.

More pics here

Happy to convocate!

2009-07-01T15:03:00.007+08:00

"RE: Convocation online form

Admissions for Postgraduate Programmes (GPR)

Wednesday, July 1, 2009 11:12:12 AM

To:

Dear Graduate,

The convocation online form is currently available to all graduates of Convocation 2009 to.........."

I am happy. Very happy. I've been waiting for this eventful and wonderful email/letter since I handed in my thesis for examination, and received notice that I've passed my thesis, and will be recommended for graduation. It signifies a very important milestone in my life, one that I've worked, sweated, cried through, and sometimes felt like giving the whole thing up.

So come 29th July, I will be convocating!!! Praise be to God for all that He has done, and worked in my life through this journey of my masters programme.

I will write regarding my journey after I convocate!

Me is happy!!!!

Forgiving

2009-06-26T16:00:00.002+08:00

Anger makes you small, but forgiveness makes you bigger; it makes you grow

Talk to me!

2009-06-23T15:25:00.005+08:00

After a long silence...

I kinda raised my voice and said "Stop talking into my ear!!!!" this morning. Hubs turns around and says "Huh?? What? What did you say?" No answer. "What did you say darling?" he repeats. I open and shut my eyes again, and just laugh out loud.

Turns out I was sleep talking. Hauhauha! I rarely ever do, and I can actually count the number of times I've done that. Beats me what I was dreaming about, but I was saying that sentence to Miss Pris in my dream.

After I went back to sleep, I then proceed to dream of myself in high school all over again, and I was in form 5, after the long vacation. I couldn't remember what class I belonged to. To top it off, I had classmates that didn't exist in real life. They were from other social circles and they were in my school.

I told hubs about this weird high school dream, and he goes "You dreamt of your old boyfriend in high school?" I smirk and say, "Yeah, boyfriend in girls' school" :P Nyehehehe.

And before I chao, I need to put this up about talking:

Fart Face

2009-03-29T23:21:00.004+08:00

Hubby and I were walking in an open public area. A group of people were in front of us, I think a family.

Cough, cough (at the same time, prrrooootttt prrooooottttt!!)

I just kept quiet. It was so clearly a fart coming out at the same time he (one of the guys in front of us) coughed! I mean, it's pretty normal for people to experience that. But in public!?

Oh goodness. I continued walking and then I decided to share the joke with hubs, and he goes "Ya, he farted rightttt!!!!!" We burst out in laughter. Oh boy. Things people do ah...

I know that guys don't mind doing it in public with their friends, but girls, no way!!!

Of toilets and slippers

2009-03-09T19:12:00.007+08:00

Question: WHY do some certain toilets' flush work on its own accord, flushing germs and rubbish into people's backsides while they're sitting on the throne?

I am sitting in the toilet in a mall in Singapore. To my horror and disgust, without any warning, and suddenly the flush goes off, and I jump off the throne. This is not the first time it's happening, and today, I am reminded how irritating this amazingly "helpful" gadget is supposed to be. It's supposed to help you prevent germs from getting on to your fingers when you press the flush button, but hey, germs and bacteria and goodness knows what, is instead flushed into your backside. Wow, isn't that so lovely? Additional washing for your lovely butt.

Next up, I'm walking nicely in the rain with Jo under the umbrella, and then my slippers decide to play funny on me, AGAIN. Hey looking back as to the last time it happened, it is exactly 2 years and 1 day old. Is this a 2 years once event for me? :S Thank God Jo had spare slippers in her school chest. I walked barefooted in public before that la. Phheewww...

Meanwhile, I'm sneezing, feverish, headaching, bodyaching and typing this. Ciaooo...

After a while...

2009-02-25T09:06:00.006+08:00

Last night hubs and I took some time to go for drinks and just sit and chat.

Marriage life can be the same mundane routine, day in, day out, morning, afternoon, night. Next day, again. Doing a little something different out of the norm puts a little spice into your everyday life.

We're up in KL now for a few days again for hub's work, and after his business dinner, it was oh-so-nice to just sit and lounge and eat our chilli prawns and drink at a cafe (not hub's luuuuvvvvly chillied prawns he loves baking at home, that's one to taste, y'all). It was lovely to just chat goofily, share our hearts, and just let loose a lil.

I likey.

Hubs calling in sick

2009-02-10T13:55:00.004+08:00

Hubby came down with fever from Saturday till Sunday, and slightly on Monday; but it was an odd fever. No signs of any infections whatsoever and this comes. On and off, and then on again and then off again. ????

I was baffled. Also, was slightly alarmed, since mumsie was saying that it doesn't sound normal. Not normal? Adding on to that was that a friend of a friend had just passed away very suddenly in his sleep and for no apparent reason. Call me a paranoid wife, but I was scared in my pajamas thinking "what if this, what if that, what if this and that".

I lay in bed watching out for hubby. Set my alarm clock for odd hours to check on him. Come Sunday morning, I was a zombie. I could not even hear my alarm clock. That used to be me in secondary school years, but I'm changed now (yes Ly, Jo, I am changed); I can hear my alarm, regardless of what my sisters say. But I couldn't on Sunday morning. I was so zonked out.

Seriously wonder to myself, when I have a child(ren), how on earth am I going to stay up at night feeding and nursing my child(ren)? God help me.

Despite it all, he's well now. The fever just went away as mysteriously as it came. It was so weird. Perhaps it was the lamb we had on our date night on Friday. Who knows righttttt?

Makan!

2009-02-06T15:57:00.003+08:00

Are your dinners anything like the 3 cartoons above? Hehehheeh!!

Since I'm living separately from my family, I eat most my meals with my husband, once in awhile with friends, and at the least, once a week with my family. It isn't a bad thing eating most my meals with hubby, though I miss having meals with my family too. I miss the noise, and laughter and competing voices and also the banter over a meal at home. Sure, I do go home for meals once in a while, but it is not an everyday thing.

Would I want to make sure my family has meals together? Sure thing, I do. Why do I think it's a great tradition?

Read on here

5 months forward

2009-02-06T12:45:00.004+08:00

Hubs and I have been married for 5 months now, and it's been an interesting and fun-learning journey.

We have our many good days, and some occasional grouchy and not so good days, but all's good. We love and laugh, talk and discuss, relax and plan, play and live.

Just along those lines, it's a myth to believe and think that couples who get married do not have problems and issues to deal with. Even more than that, it's a complete and utter terrible myth to believe and think that Christian couples have no problems and issues to deal with.

True, we should expect Christian couples to have a better relationship because we have God, but, it is not because of believing in God that we automatically have better relationships, but it is because we practice the character of God that we can have a chance at better relationships; kindness, faithfulness, goodness, self-control, etc.

However, saying that, we still have challenges to face in relationships. We come from different family backgrounds, upbringing, habits, preferences, dislikes, hobbies, and much much much much much more differences than just these few. 2 of us coming together and trying to build a home in where there is love requires much hard work. It's not all fun and laughter, it's serious and sometimes tension-filled too; a home needs both. Not just lovey-dovey feelings all day long, everyday.

What makes the difference? The way it is settled and handled. Problems are unavoidable, we can't hide ourselves from them. The way we handle it is a choice, we can make a difference.

We both made choices, and the choices we make shape our relationship today. One that I love, and one that I totally cherish.

Sometimes...

2009-01-14T15:08:00.002+08:00

...it's easier to shoot off a sarcastic remark, than think twice about the words I say.
...it's easier to compare the "good" lives that others have, than thank God for what I have.
...it's easier to compare my husband to other women's husbands, than be appreciative of the wonderful man Jaeson is.
...it's easier to grumble and complain, than be reminded that my mouth is to be used for positive things instead of poison.
...it's easier to slack off, than run for excellence.

Sometimes. Or shall I say, most of the times?

Which will I choose? Life, or death?

The mobile ones

2008-11-27T01:33:00.005+08:00

Life after getting married? We've been so mobile. We're here today, there tomorrow, another place next week, and back again and off again.

If I'm not with hubs, then I'm at my parents' home. We've both lived in our new place for a grand total of.....ta-da! Less than one month out of the almost 3 months of married life. 33% or less, that's how much time we've spent in our home. The lizards are having a whale of a time peeing and pooing in our home. Writing this from my in-laws place makes me think about going back home tomorrow and checking the house out, and think about the wonderful gifts they've left me and hubs, gee. So exciting. That's besides the point, really. The point is, we've been out so much. Which is why the lizards are coming. Again. and again.

Not working for the moment is working out great for hubs and myself since he's been travelling so much. Whenever I can, I go with him. Otherwise, I'm at dad and mum's place; my sister deems I don't feel married enough to her.

We were in Vietnam a while back (stories and piccies later). It was nice to go with him, though I flew a day later than him due to my thesis work. It was nice to actually go with him to places that he's been to, but I've only heard about until the few weeks ago. He's currently there now, and over the phone he tells me this, and that, and etc etc, and I'm so glad that I can understand better what he's talking about since I've seen and experienced another side of his life, since he travels so much.

This whole travelling thing has helped me be more flexible, more willing to adapt to change. I have enjoyed whatever travelling we've done together, though he's at work and I'm left to my own devices (no, not evil ones!!!). Those have been times we get to spend with each other, and it's been so great. Though we haven't had the 'real' thing of me welcoming him home after a day's work, it still can be done wherever we are. For the times that I cannot follow mainly because of his work nature, it has helped us appreciate each other more. I am used to his travelling and being away, but I definitely am not used to missing him loads. Truck loads.

This whole month has been incredible. He stays in an Indonesian kampung for close to 2 weeks, comes back and we both feel like we're strangers to each other, gosh. And then flies off to Vietnam and travels all over the country and coming back next week. It's so funny that before we got married and when we were separated by distance the many times we were, it didn't feel so horrible. But now that we're married, we seriously felt like strangers when we met after he came back. I told him that I felt he was such a stranger, and he has a comeback for me, "yah, I feel like you're on too!!!" Funny. I think it's different now. And that's good.

Married life is great. It's really great, and I don't know what other word to use, but it's nice. Nice. I likey.

Of names

2008-11-27T01:00:00.006+08:00

Somehow, I have been engaging in writing my name in full the last few days for different purposes and reasons. Formal of course, not for pure fun and entertainment of myself just married.

It's such an odd feeling. I look at the column stating "NAME:____", and I think two times, three times, sometimes more than that, hey no, ALWAYS more than that, and wonder what my name is. I write Eunice Tang, and then Eunice ~~Tang~~, and then Eunice Cheng, and then look at it, blink, blink more, and wonder whether I should write it that way, and then just put my form, or application, or whatever I'm doing in.

When was writing my own name so difficult?

Adjustments. I'm not complaining, but I'm amused. It's interesting to actually feel so different when I'm called something else.

I don't usually respond to people who call me by my Chinese name, just because I'm not used to it. But Eunice Cheng, that is something else. It'll take some getting used to. But not that I'm complaining; I told my husband that I love his surname. Hehehe..!!!

Oh yah, I'm not only Eunice Cheng, I'm also Mdm Eunice Tang in some references. Oh my goodness. I feel so like an aunty. I know that Madam just means that your name is referred to in the 'older version' of being unmarried previously, but, oh MDM! I now officially feel old-ER.

Falling in love

2008-11-04T10:35:00.003+08:00

Is falling in love really that easy..? Is there even such a thing as falling in love? Read on..

1 month ++ after

2008-10-31T20:42:00.005+08:00

Ooohhh...what a mighty long time I've been away from the blog. Right after our wedding, we went to Krabi, Thailand for our honeymoon.

Right after that, we went back to JB for Jaeson's classes. Since then, we've been up and down JB & Singapore, and Kluang. He's also been overseas for work, and when he's away, I stay with my parents :)

It's been a very interesting and enjoyable almost 2 months being married. Many have been asking "How's married life?" I will say, "It's really nice! Someone to come home to (maybe that's for the hubby, since I go out less than him), someone to share life with, to laugh and have fun with, to plan and dream with". In short, a companion for life.

I always wonder about couples who married in the name of love, and then years later, divorce in the name of enemies. It's scary the way many couples end that way. Sure, there's bumpy places, tough rides, but that's part of life. Whoever does not expect rough times and difficult patches, s/he will be in for the shock of his/her life! I read once in James Dobson's writing that geing married, you also have to expect change. What great words. Change is the only constant; I always say to those who ask how Jaeson and I lasted 2 periods of long distance relationship totally 4.5 years out of 6 --> commitment and changing together. Without commitment, both parties have no security in each other and the relationship. Without changing together, both of you become strangers to each other...

Meanwhile, we're just living from day to day, enjoying each other's presence, and having fun being newly weds!

Cheers to married life! :)

Snippets of 6th September 2008

2008-09-16T16:23:00.013+08:00

I woke up at 5.45am at the sound of my mobile phone alarm clock (for the first time, no snoozing it. He he he!). After washing up and grabbing a bite, Mum gathered us round to pray for the last time as a family, before I became a Mrs. That was so sad, and there were much tears - sad but very happy occasion. Bye bye but hello also. Talking about that, I am now away from home with hubby in his parents' place in JB, and I'm missing home. Oh well, back to the pics.

So we prayed and then my makeup artist came. She's really good - her name's Eve. If any of you would like recommendations for makeup or hairdos, she's really good. I can refer you on to her if any of you want her to do stuff for you. Heh heh. Anyway, getting back to the day; so makeup session was quite long. Dad said "2 hours plus for such a small surface area of the face?" and shook his head. Hehehehe!!! That really is so dad to say that. Everyone else in the house was also making up, and dressing up, and doing all sorts to be ready for the wedding.

Jaeson's side was making their way down to Kluang from JB. He and the boys. I mean men... After my makeup, Dad and Mum did the veiling and gave words of wisdom of being a good wife, and being under the authority of my husband and to submit to him. Dad, Ly and I were then the last to leave our home after everyone else had left. Merv came with the [oh so loved] car, and we went off. My heart was beating, beating, beating like mad. Thinking back now, it was really fun lah! He he he!!
Daddy was so wonderful; he walked according to the motion even though we didn't practice in church. We had a family gathering the night before so he couldn't make it to our rehearsal. He is a man who usually walks very fast (including eating, bathing, driving, etc). But for that day, he was s..l...o....w...... as compared to his normal walking style. He said "I think no need to go for rehearsal. No need to rehearse walking, I walk everyday what!" HAHAHAH!!!!

So anyhow, we had a very fun ceremony. Spontaneous, and funny moments. Both of us were nervous when the vows part came. We had memorized them, and still we were afraid we'd forget them! Pastor James who solemnized and officiated our marriage together with Pastor Chung Wah (both from Jaeson's church in JB, Full Gospel Church) were brilliant. The message was lighthearted, and yet meaningful. I got a little tearful when Li Poh started reading the poem, and I got so much more tearful during our appreciation for our parents. It was a challenge trying to compose myself to say what I wanted to say. Mum and the girls and I think many others got teary too. No no, Mum and the girls were more than teary. Oh well...

We saw so many of our friends, people we hadn't seen in ages and ages, and it was so wonderful to see so many people again. Thank you once again to everyone who came.
We later on had tea ceremonies for both sides of the families - Chinese tradition to introduce the new couple to family members. It is still odd for us both to call our in-laws by "Dad", "Mum", "Pa", and "Ma". We both try not to giggle when we call them by their new names. Thank God my sister-in-law doesn't call me "Da Sou". Huahuahua. Would be the funniest ever!
We had our dinner reception at Pekin Sutera, JB. We absolutely loved the restaurant the minute my dad-in-law brought us there one year ago. Although we knew the time keeping and travelling from Kluang to JB would be quite crazy, but we decided that it'd be that way - half-half between both sides for the day. He he. So after the Kluang tea ceremony, we left for JB and had another tea ceremony there. After JB tea ceremony, washed up, bathed, and cleaned all the stuff out of my hair and face (!!) and then went straight to the restaurant for makeup again! Talk about rushing.. Oh boy.

We loved our dinner place - huge stage, great sounds, beautiful lighting, good waiters and waitresses, amazing ambience, and of course, delicious food. They had the standard food presentation, and then, we were really pleasantly surprised by the fireworks!! The food was great! And we of course had more time to chat and meet with people.

My dearest husband sang me a surprise song, Steven Curtis Chapman's "I will be here". It was absolutely touching. No wonder he was rushing through the hi's and chatting, coz he needed to be on stage at a particular timing.. it was so wonderful of him and he also got the boys to help him out to be his kaki-kaki in the song. Love him to bits!! His voice and guitar skills are some of the things that I'm so thankful for..

We had an amazing 101 tables for the dinner, and we did not have time to go to every table! It was incredible - say hello, talk and chat for a bit, and then move to next table of guests. It was hard to go to some tables and not to others. I was quite disappointed that I did not get to go to the youth tables, and I apologize for not coming back! The whole night went by so quickly, and there wasn't enough time to run back to you guys. So so so sorry... But I have the morning picture from church, so at least we've got one ya!

We've got heaps more pictures other than these collages I've put up, and they're all on our website. Please feel free to visit, and view them. You can also download the pictures by clicking on them, and another page will appear and then do the save thingy, and etc. You all know what to do right? :) All photos posted on the website currently are from our good friend, Samuel Tan. His photography is brilliant, and we love the pictures he's taken at our wedding to bits!!!

Cheers to all and have a great evening!!!

Just married and car woe

2008-09-15T19:20:00.004+08:00

Just married and I sadly injured up my husband's precious car :|

We both went together in to Singapore for his classes, and I to visit Ly and Jo. So I dropped him in uni, and off I go with his [precious] car.

Went to the hospital to fetch Ly from work, and visit her little Putri, and eat (!!!!) McDonalds. After that we decided to drop by Jo's school to see her studio..that's where we got into the trouble. We had parked outside her school at some open carpark, and it was a sideparking. Not the angled one, it's the SIDE one. I was the first car in the front, and of course, it was a kerb in front of the wheels. Nevermind that when we got down, but when we had finished our excursion to Jo's studio, we got in the car to drive off to go to the supposed Vivo City. Fat hopes lah.

We got in, I put the car into gear and off we go. Forward. I forgot to go backward first and then only forward. The car bumper scraped the kerb. The girls in the car went "J.I.E.!!." I opened my eyes wide, took a deep breath, and reversed slowly. That did the bumper bad. I could her the scraping sound, and we all grimaced. We ran out of the car, and my heart just sank. While reversing slowly, the friction between the kerb and the weight of the car had ripped the bumper a little from the car front. My heart just sank. Sank. We tried fixing it back, but no success. So we got in, and reversed and did some more-than-3-point-turn to get out of that side parking lot. The kerb was too near, and I hit it AGAIN. I could now hear AND feel the bumper scraping again, and my sisters shrieked more, and my heart sank even lower.

The bumper was now worse than ever! I didn't know what to do, and say. We were laughing in distress, if ever there was such a thing. Thank God that there was a man who was walking who offered to help me get the car out of the position of disaster. The car was out on the road, but the bumper was still not in place. We did not have any other choice, but to go on with our Vivo plan.

Halfway driving, there was a enormously loud and scary sound of something scraping against the road. I was scared, and so afraid that the whole bumper had dropped off. We turned into a side street and figured out what was happening. Something had come loose near the mudguard and was scraping against the road when we drove. Good thing it wasn't the bumper that had dropped off!! We fixed it back, and went on the road again. Then it happened again. And again, and again. Few times on the expressways it did that. We never reached Vivo because we also had lost our way and by the time we were nearby, it was almost time to fetch Jaeson. Sigh.. we went back to our flat instead to collect my things that I had left behind before moving back to Malaysia. We stopped one last time when the bottom part scraped - being very creative, my sisters used torn up and twisted plastic bags to substitute string/rope and tied that bottom part to some secure position. All these done on the expressway with cars, buses, lorries, motorcycles zooming past us. I seriously felt like a mad woman...I was wearing a dress somemore, of all things!!!

It really was the adventure of the day. However, I was so grateful for my sisters who were with me. Ly was the "calmer" of the event, cool as a cucumber. Jo was the resourceful mechanic, ever so good with her hands. Me - creator of trouble. Hauhauhauah!

Now, to present the injured car to my husband. We went to fetch him from uni, and my sisters warned him first when they met him first that I had something to tell him about his car. He was ever gracious, so kind. He just looked at his [precious] car, and said, "It's ok, don't worry about it", and progressed to try remedying the bumper. I felt so relieved, and thanked God for such a wonderful and understanding man. He brought it yesterday to the workshop to fix it and thankfully didn't cost a big bomb. Phheewwww...

Thank God for my wonderful and understanding hubby.

And of course, his wonderful car.

M is for married!

2008-09-15T15:26:00.004+08:00

We had a blast at our wedding. The year of planning, and the many months of fretting and everything else paid off! Friends and family from near and far came to celebrate with us on our big day. So many people helped us and we wouldn't have had such a wonderful day without the help of everyone involved. We also wouldn't have had such a wonderful day without the presence of everyone who came that day. It was lighthearted, meaningful and fun for both Jaeson and I. We enjoyed both the morning ceremony, as well as our dinner where we got to chat and meet with more people.

It went by so quickly, and I kept reminding myself to enjoy, enjoy, and enjoy more! In no time at all, our day was over and we settled down for rest and then left for Krabi, Thailand on Monday. We had a very nice and relaxing time there. Great outings to the island, and inlands, made some friends too. More pictures from our wedding and trip will be uploaded soon, but for now, there're our pre-wedding outdoor photoshoot album pics on our website.

Still feels weird and odd calling Jaeson my husband, but I'll get used to it. It still doesn't feel as though we're married; it's like we're still fiance and fiancee to each other! It's okay, we will just enjoy our new life together, no pressure to have any 'fffeeeellliiiiinnnnggg' of being married. We're having fun, discovering more about each other, our quirks and oddities, laughing and enjoying each other's presence.

Thank you everyone, and cheers to married life!

Nearer and nearer

2008-09-03T08:43:00.004+08:00

Our wedding's getting nearer; 3 more days! Preparation for events have never been so stressful because it's not so dear and close to my heart as my own wedding.

We had a meeting last week, and it felt so nice to know that we've got friends who are there with us supporting and helping us out. Thank you in advance to all of you.

Running around like a headless chicken, needless to say, has been tiring, as well as not allowing me to have space to digest what's going on. I have resorted to sitting in the comfy armchair in the living room, or on my bed before I sleep, to think through what's happening, and how I feel, etc.

I'm happy but yet kind of sad - I will miss my family so much, and although we'll be close by just down the road, but it's different. I won't be there to enjoy everyday life with them anymore, as we will have a separate house and life. I won't be there to share Dad's wackiness and unpredictability, Mum's wise words, my sisters' crazy jokes and shrieking laughter in the middle of the day and night. I will miss my home and the people in it.

It will definitely bring change and adjustments not only for myself and Jaeson but also for people around us - family and friends. Through these all, and until the day, we will stand and say that God is good, and God will always be good.

On a lighter note, we look forward to seeing family and friends this weekend at our wedding, and we look forward to enjoying it with everyone who comes! See you all sooonnnn!!!!

House burnt

2008-08-04T21:04:00.007+08:00

Say "house burnt!" many, many times, and say it as quickly as you can. Try it at least 30 times.

Tried it?

We used to ask each other to do that, and then cackle and giggle silly-ly, saying, "IIiieeeeee... you say husband!!!!! Everyone, she said HUSBAND!!!!!" Small girl games! Hehehehhe!

To think that when we were young we used to think it's so disgusting and yucky to think of getting married, and along the way, we changed to be okay with the idea, and then eventually to embrace and accept positively the whole notion of marriage and love and setting up your own family. And, having a husband.

And no, getting married is not related to having your house burnt; but it definitely entails getting a husband. *Smile*

Lizzy Lizzy

2008-08-01T20:02:00.005+08:00

I work in an office where Lizzy loves visiting. Lizzy likes to come in, and leave messages of love for me.

One day, Lizzy came visiting, but that was the last of Lizzy's life, because...Lizzy decided to electrocute Lizzy's self.

Lizzy climbed INTO my computer power box on Wednesday, and bathed in the warmth, and lo and behold it went bzzbzbzbbzbzbzbz.

I came back from school, walked into my office and sat down, and the monitor starts flickering and I'm thinking my computer's mad. It restarts itself, and I'm thinking, it's realllllyyyy bonkers. And then, it dies. I try turning it on, it fails me. Lizzy is truly powerful. I wait till the next day, and try turning it on again, and it trips the whole electricity supply to all the computers in the company, and it's Lizzy's fault. Lizzy is REALLY powerful.

So, I'm told to leave my computer alone, till the comp guy comes to fix it up. Thing is, we all didn't know Lizzy had wanted to take a nap in there. So I never knew about Lizzy until TODAY, Friday! How did I find Lizzy? I walk in to my room in the morning, and smell something a little fishy. Actually, I smelt something yesterday already when I was on the phone and could smell a whiff of fishiness. I thought that it must be the rubbish chute outside my window. But this morning, I knew it was NOT the rubbish chute outside my window. I bent down to smell my comp, and OH MY GOODNESS!! I almost threw up.

A few of us opened it up, with screwdriver and torchlight, oh mannnnnnn.. SO gross. It was Lizzy. The Lizard. ARGH!!!!

Lizzy the Lizard decided to commit suicide in MY computer power box. Why my computer power box! Almost 1/3 of my morning was gone dealing with Lizzy.

On a side note, after dealing with [on the way to decomposting] Lizzy, I still have to deal with body odour, bad breath, and sweaty armpits on the way home on the mrt. I thank God for my ever sensitive sense of smell, but it has its drawbacks too.

37 sleeps...

2008-07-31T22:52:00.006+08:00

Oh yeaahhhhh...37 more sleeps to go.

When I sit and think about me in 37 more days changing status to a wifey, it's weird. It hasn't really sunk in yet, and I think it won't until the wedding is over, and we get into our husbandly-wifely lives.

Anyhow, my friends keep saying "Enjoy the process of planning!! Don't let the frenzy and whatevernots get to you and make you so stressed!" True true true.. Sometimes I get so stressed I don't feel like having all the details and whatever nots. But trying to keep my head above all these, and of course my heart too lah. Tee hee hee.

Apart from marriage plans, life still goes on. Time seriously goes by so fast, I don't know where to. I've at last put in my resignation for my work in Singapore, and although it was, and currently still is, a pleasure and such a great experience working in Singapore in the organization, something has to give. There is a time and season for all, and it is a time to now realign my focus and roles.

My new role as wife and helpmeet to Jaeson means that I follow him, instead of him following me. My priorities now shift, and means that I will have to place our [upcoming] marriage as priority, and not my career advancement. I do not regret, neither do I grudge it; in fact, I am oh-so-looking forward to being back together.

Of the 6.5++ years we've been together in courtship, 2 years were spent apart while I was in Australia, and another 2.5++ years while I was in Singapore. I travelled back and forth Malaysia and Australia every semester, and back and forth Malaysia and Singapore every week. That's soon gonna be over, over and over. We're both so looking forward to no more of such things. PHhewwww, and whoooppeeddooooo!!! Though leaving my workplace is somewhat a sad thing, but it's also met with much joy, anticipation and excitement of what is beyond.

God has been providing for us, and seeing us through the different seasons, and now another season of our lives is here, we believe God will lead us through. He's been providing so much, and we believe He will continue to provide!

Ohh..37 sleeps...and counting.

Plasticky slippers

2008-07-23T17:43:00.002+08:00

This is what's called a need for slippers, or shoes.

I am humbled by this...I was looking for some pics of shoes for a programme I'm working on for work, and came across this!

My goodness me. We truly live in such a luxurious world, in comparison to these people who have such great need. May we learn to live simply, minus the complexities of life. May we learn to be humble, minus the pomp and grandeur of being "rich". May we learn to come back to the basics of our life - our need for the Living God.

Surreal

2008-06-23T19:22:00.004+08:00

Life has been sorta like a blurry run for me for the past month, and going to be so for at least the next 2 to 3 months. Gulp.

Wedding preparations are picking up momentum (I can hear my sisters groaning and nodding violently saying "IT'S SO ABOUT TIME!!!!") and Jaeson a.k.a. hubby-to-be has been increasing in his detailed-ness. It's been all in all fun preparing and discussing the plans, as well as for the future. As of today, we have 74 days left to our wedding, and we're counting down. So exciting!! 74????!!!?? That is like, 10 more weeks. As I type this, I'm freaking out a little coz there's still quite a bit to do. Oh golly.

Ly, Jo, our aunt, and I went to the tailor that day, and the experience, though so simple, but it was so exciting. It was so surreal that we were at the tailor to actually do some tailoring for the wedding bridal party. Goodness gracious. I think I won't get over the surreal feeling until after September 6th, and weeks or months after that. I had a good friend getting married, and on the morning of her wedding, she held my hands and shoulders and looked me in the eyes, and said "Euniceeee!! I'm getting married!!?!??" I said, "YES, you ARE getting married". I think I am going to be in that position as well. Oh oh oh goodness me.

Aside from wedding preps, I've my thesis to complete, work in Singapore, church and ministry in Kluang, family and Jaeson in Kluang, MYPG, etc etc etc.; really need God's wisdom in time management, and handling everything with excellence. It is only with His wisdom and strength that I'll be able to go through this.

It is sometimes quite overwhelming to think of the things to do and to complete, and as I mentioned before, very surreal. Not only about the wedding, but everything else. Everything seems to be moving at top speed. I have a theory that time seems to move faster as my age moves up the ladder. I look back and think to myself, golly me, so many months already gone past, and it's the middle of the year? It is now almost the end of June, and I need to take stock. Take stock of my life, and realign myself for the days to come.

In Your presence, that's where I am strong

In Your presence, Oh Lord my God

In Your presence, that's where I belong

Seeking Your face

Touching Your grace

In the cleft of the Rock

In Your presence Oh God!

His mercies are new every morning

2008-06-02T19:54:00.004+08:00

Wedding coming up

2008-05-27T20:25:00.005+08:00

It's the countdown to the wedding! Almost 3 months left and counting down. That's like, 12 weeks; 12 Mondays, 12 Tuesdays, 12 weekends, 12 times more coming from Singapore to a weekend in Kluang. Even as I write this, it becomes more real, or should it be surreal?

There's still stuff to prepare, and plan for, shop for, etc. It's easy to get into the frenzy of shopping and being a mad-about bride-to-be, but in the midst of it all, I have to remind myself that the wedding is only a day in as compared to the many days that we will live as husband and wife in a marriage that is for life.

I am on this journey of learning, praying, and seeking God to what being a wife means. It's quite crazy to think of it that within a second of the signature on a piece of paper, I will be legally bonded to another person whom I would call my husband. I can't even get round thinking that he is my fiance for now, what more husband. Oh goodness golly me. LP said that by the time I get used to calling him my fiance, it'll be time to call him my husband. She's right..

Dad is always reminding me, "A wedding is only a day, the marriage is for life". That's true. That's the very reason why we refuse to splurge like mad and not save for the marriage. That's the reason why we don't go ballistic over every small detail and argue over every small thing. We're trying to keep a balance between the special day, and also keeping the future and reality of marriage in check.

Well, pray for us! We need your prayers, for the special day, as well as for the future of our marriage. It's all going to begin on the 6th of September, 2008.

You is no understanding me?

2008-04-25T18:21:00.004+08:00

In the same effort that Jit has of encouraging you wonderful guys to read, I am posting this up:
It's an excellent start to trying to understand some of the confusing and quirky sides of the opposite sex (remember, you're going to be marrying someone of the opposite sex in the years down the road!! *wink*). Quite a number of questions asked by you guys in the forum we had last week at YF were very interesting, so those who'd like to borrow this book and try to understand some parts of the opposite sex, do let me know; you can borrow this book from me!

Pinch your nose!

2008-04-21T23:03:00.005+08:00

What do you do if you see thick smoke coming out from your neighbour's house?
Answer: Close your house windows
What else can you do if you see thick smoke coming from your neighbour's house?
Answer: Ermmm...pinch your nose.

HAUHUAHAUHAUH!!!! So so so cute. I was doing a testing session with a Primary 1 child, and part of it was asking some questions. She answered the, when in effect, there should have been an answer regarding finding some help. Oh my goodness, I couldn't help but chuckle to myself, and control my laughter! Can't laugh out loud in front of a client, can I?

So nice and refreshing to have such responses from children and clients. Makes work so much more interesting and lighthearted, so much more enjoyable...

Engaged!

2008-04-15T00:22:00.004+08:00

Jaeson and I had our little engagement dinner affair last Saturday with the presence of some family members and some friends. It was a nice time with gathering and introduction of different groups of people to each other. Much fun and laughter, time spent with family and friends, and much, much, too much, good food.

The engagement gathering was meant to thank people who've been helping us, and going to be helping us in the few months to come and beyond. It was also meant to be a celebration of our relationship going on to another level, and to a promise of marriage to each other. I used to think engagement was like an event of announcing to everyone that I'm getting married to a person. But when I read that the engagement actually is a declaration of a promise to marry, it sank in much deeper and it was a realization that it's not just a glamourous thing to wear a ring around my finger, not just a time of feeling happy and on top of the world that a man wants to marry me, but rather, a solemn promise to be committed to the promise of going-to-be-married-to-you.

It's rather exciting to consider that in a few months' time, I'll be a married woman (eeeppss!); at the same time, it's rather daunting to think of the challenges ahead, for marriage (I've heard) is not a bed of roses and lovely box of chocolates.

On the journey to wifehood, I walk. Some pictures from the night and after the dinner; enjoy! (Got to click on the image to view pictures, they're a little too small)

Flying to the top of the world!

2008-04-06T14:41:00.003+08:00

So Jaeson says he wanted to go to Singapore for the Popular Bookfair last Friday, and then after to go back Kluang together. He comes along to Singapore and during dinner, announces that he might not go to the fair after all, since he already has tons of books, and quite a bit still left unread. I say, "Okay, so what shall we do then?" He says, "Let's go lepak in town!". That was fine by me... So we went to fetch Jo and then went down to town.

So then, we were driving along town area and he says "Let's go try the air balloon lah!" Me, freaked out by the idea of being suspended high high high in the air, opposed it immediately "No no no!!!!" I'm scared of heights, see, so I used the excuse "Hey, but I think it's gonna be quite expensive!!!" But he's really adventurous and loves trying new things, and he coaxes me saying, "Come lah, let's see. Okay, if it's not too expensive, we'll try lah, ok!" We parked the car, go to the hot air balloon grounds, and he walks to the counter and says, "Can I have 3 tickets, please?" I was like "Ermmmm, what on earth was that?!?!?" silently in my heart, and my heart started beating very quickly. Very quickly. The thought of flying very high in the air with nothing below me to support me was very scary. So we had our 'flight tickets' and 'flight numbers'. Oh boy.

We got on our 'flight' with some 10 odd other people, and it goes higher and higher and higher. I was holding on for dear life, while Jo was busy laughing at me. (!!???!?!) So we flew until we reached some point in the air where we stopped and the balloon rotating around for the 'passengers' to have a look at the city sights. I was looking to my left and right, and just calming myself down. At one point, I turn around, and saw Jaeson on his knee, and I'm thinking "What on earth is he doing?" and he says "Will you marry me?", and I see a ring in his hand, and knew that he was not joking. "Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness!" was all I could say and think of at that moment!!!

Jo suddenly calls from nearby "Oooopppssss... no more battery in my camera!!!" Huahauhauhauh!!

Well, it was exhilarating. Totally unexpected, and very surprising. Sweet! I love him to bits!!! I don't love him purely because of the surprise, but for many other reasons. Another story, that one :)

Hear me!

2008-04-03T14:00:00.001+08:00

My butt is round, like the earth.
I love my beautiful butt!:D

Hello, work

2008-03-29T01:24:00.004+08:00

It's been so interesting at work. I started off with not that much to do, but now I'm having lots to do. Been involved with running programs and talks in schools on character, managing oneself, etc etc. Foster parent recruitment. Counselling. Children with disabilities. So wide scope, and can be quite tiring running from one focus to another; but it's been such a good learning curve. Briefings, meetings, more briefings, and more meetings. I only work 3 days a week for now, but feels like a whole lot more. I'm not complaining; I enjoy what I am learning.

I meet all sorts of people on the job. Teachers, parents, children. Some so nice, some so amusing, but some very nasty, some very obnoxious. The nasty and obnoxious ones, I just let their looks, and words roll of my back; the nice and amusing ones, I take them as the little joys that bring more life and make work so refreshing. Oh goodness me, some of the little children in the schools, they are soooooo cute! And even more, the answers that they give you when you ask them questions, sometimes I just want to laugh because they are so amusing!!!

For the record, today's the first time I was called "Madam". Okkkkkaaaayyyyyy... But that's not to say it was derogatory coz all the female teachers in that particular school are called "Madam". Interesting.

All in all, my work life has been interesting. My colleagues are warm people. The office environment is welcoming. Really thank God for this opportunity to expand my learning and experiences, and also His favour upon me. He is a God that really provides, and sees to our desires, even in terms of work. Work can be enjoyable, and God can provide that means of that work. :) Happy working, people!

Life, Love, and Sex

2008-03-29T00:40:00.003+08:00

So yes, together with quite a few of my colleagues we went to an all boys' school to conduct the class workshop on Life, Love, and Sex. Interesting is the word. So I went into the class together with another of my male colleague. So, a class of 40 odd boys, with 2 adult males. A whole lot of testosterone. I started off the talk with the introduction, and there were shouts and screams from the whole class; almost all the boys in the class were so excited to hear the topic. Okay, these are real boys.

Boys being boys, with their really boyish statements and comments about the whole topic. So my colleague was talking about condoms and how they sometimes can be defective in the process of manufacturing (it's 1 in 6), and the boys said "Wear 2!!!", or "Blow and test and see whether it's spoilt!!!" Okkkkaaaayyyy. In the heat of passion, a very passionate male would think of testing the condom to see if it's defective? *cough* NO WAY. I was smiling to myself thinking that these kids are so innocent and naive. However innocent and naive they were and yet so exposed to the influence of media and the sexually charged messages they are faced with every single day. Just so you know, our programme promotes abstinence. Some of the boys didn't know what abstinence was, and we had to explain it.

I think that sexual education really should be promoted in schools. Sexual education isn't only about the physical act of sexual intimacy. It is also about appreciating life and living life to the full, teaching about relationships, love, and life.

Well, it was indeed interesting to come out of the class full of testosterone, very intriguing to actually observe that there really is such a big difference between girls and guys and how God made us different. Amazing...!

Marriage or not?

2008-03-04T18:46:00.002+08:00

I receive in my email periodically newsletters and such from various sources, and one of them was an article regarding marriage: Those who say no to marriage. The author was writing with regards to an article in Newsweek, about this lady whom had written about not needing to have marriage to have a solid relationship - "Yes to love, no to marriage". In response, there were people who replied and made comments, and this is the result of it. You can go read them for yourself; glad to say that there are many who commented who still think that marriage is good instead of bad. Phew.

Many people think that marriage is useless, or rather, don't believe in marriage. Do you? If you do, why? Some of you might be think you're too young to think of marriage, but seriously, it's not. I've dreamt of getting married since I was a wee young girl. But now that I'm older, the reality of marriage is no more just the wedding day; it's about the realization of what it means to be a wife, a spouse, a partner, a helper. Later on, when children come along, it adds on - being a mother. The thoughts and attitudes we hold toward marriage from now, will affect the way we think about marriage later on. It might change along the way, but it's good to start from now..

Fourple, people!

2008-02-12T21:52:00.000+08:00

January came and went, Chinese New Year came and still here for a week more or so and without repeating the story you can read Ly's, and I've started my new job. Yupperdoodahday.

I've started my work in Singapore, part-time though, and yesterday was my first day on the job. Went with some of my colleagues to a primary school, and here's what I learnt:

Colleague teaching about actions and consequences: What will happen if you skip detention class once?
Students: Get double detention!
Colleague: If you skip double one then you'll get.....?
Students: Triple!!
Colleague: Then if you skip the triple detentions?
Students: Get fourple!!!

Single, Double, Triple, Fourple. Huahuahuhauha. Fourple; too cute!!

4 the job, I thank God.
4 the opportunity to learn, I am thankful.
4 the cute kids on the first day of work, I laugh and thank God for such innocence.
4 life, I'm thankful I'm alive.

Faithfulness

2008-01-24T10:52:00.000+08:00

The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
"The LORD is my portion," says my soul,
"Therefore I will hope in him." – Lamentations 3:22-24

These are His promises to us, and we can claim them for ourselves, our situations, our lives, and trust in them. He is a God that never fails, never stumbles, never falls.

May you experience the faithfulness of God today in your lives.

Have a great day, everyone!

Sudoku-ing

2008-01-23T21:16:00.000+08:00

Have been playing sudoku for awhile now, you know the ones that come with the New Straits Times everyday at the back? I like it that it's challenging enough, but not that simple that it's easy-peasy. I like the challenge of thinking, and the mental dancing. But as I keep telling my mum, sudoku really has a strategy. If you get it, you will never ever need the eraser. Never :) For those who've never tried, try it! It's fun. So much fun that I cut those out that I hadn't played before, and pasted it on some piece of folded paper so I can bring it with me to sort it out. Yes, I know, there're sudoku books out in the bookshops. Tee-hee-heeee! Off to sudoku awhile now, before I get piled up with work againnnn!

He speaks

2008-01-23T19:50:00.000+08:00

All the time. God speaks in many ways, and all the time to us, just that many a times, our ears and heart and mind are tuned to other distractions and we do not hear Him speaking. It's like when you're sitting in busy McDonalds and talking with your friend, you listen to your friend's voice and not other background sounds though it's distracting. It's the same; we can tune in to God's voice.

I have recently started doing this: sit down in silence somewhere, and just say, "Lord, speak to me". And He does. Prayer is about both listening and speaking, and when we keep silent and let God speak, it is also prayer.

It is refreshing, it is cleansing, it is inspiring, it is renewing, it is wonderful. It is.

Working out!

2008-01-16T13:51:00.001+08:00

Since spraining my leg terribly on Christmas Eve last year, I haven't been doing any exercise save for one miserable swim in the pool, bicycle rides in the air on my bed, push-ups and tricep works on my bed edge, and some abdomen work and butt lifts before sleeping on my bed. Hey, the bed is such a great tool for exercising huh!

I'm working out. Not in the field, or on the tracks, or anywhere else. I'm working out in the library. My brains, that is. This blog entry is a break from the work I'm doing. I'm stinking hungry but I will not go have any lunch yet because the lab is so full of people, so I'd better finish some work before I go off, otherwise I might not get another space in the lab again.

I really do wish I could put my shoes on and just go for a run. I miss it, actually. Such irony. When I can run, I feel lazy to do so, when I can't, I feel like it. The complexity of the human nature. Sigh... A month's rest for my foot is coming to an end, and I'll get into running again. I need to get in shape, what with the Christmas goodies, and more goodies coming along for Chinese New Year. *gulp*

Back!

2008-01-15T21:31:00.000+08:00

From where? No where. He he!

Back from running away from everything! Or rather, from thinking about the future. It's been on my mind alot, and wondering what's in store, and the details I've got to work out for it. Trying to juggle finishing my thesis, practicum, going into the workforce, etc etc. In the midst of it all, I told myself, I'm going to TAKE A BREAK! Took a break I did.

Now, I'm back in reality. It's kind of tough to get back into reality, and not only that, I got to up my personal productivity by many, many, many, many, and I mean many, notches. Why, I won't go into details, but really, procrastination just gave me a nice before, shaking my legs more, but it's catching up with me now and I'm no more shaking my legs. I'm kicking myself instead. Anyway, procrastination is bad. I procrastinated. I procrastinated changing my habit of procrastinating. It's terrible.

But anyhow, procrastination has its price to pay. I must pay then.

Apart from that, I know that God has been so faithful. Truly faithful. The details are too many, but I know God has been providing and making the way for me. God is good! You can never say it with full genuineness until you experience it. Ask God for it, and He will show it to you. Like what I heard recently, God is constantly speaking, just that we are not listening. Therefore, God is always good, just that we are not paying attention to it.

God is always good!

Jehovah

2007-12-19T19:35:00.000+08:00

God is amazingly wonderful. Provider, Guide, Friend. It's amazing to experience Him working in our lives and knowing that God comes through for you in your personal situations. Learning to trust and to let God take control is a process, never an automatic press of the button.

I've been on a journey, a wonderful experience of allowing God to be God, of just resting and not fretting so much. Of just letting the reins of my life over to God and then seeing what unfolds. As it says in Isaiah,

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. -Isaiah 55:8-9

It is admittedly quite scary letting God lead me on in this journey, but when the knowledge of God's never failing love and His majesty fills me, I know that that is the better choice. And when I let God take over, beautiful things unfold, leaving me speechless and only able to stand in awe and in gratitude.

Guide me, Great Jehovah.

Ridi-ridiculous ride

2007-11-26T12:27:00.000+08:00

Just on the topic of the previous post, I searched for a picture to depict what I was wanting to write, and came across the one with the monkey, sheep and cow. It turns out to be a little animation clip, and it's quite cute! Here it is!

Ridiculous ride

2007-11-26T11:29:00.000+08:00

It was a truly ridiculous ride on the causeway last night. I have much to say about our transport system, but I shall withhold myself. The train that Ly and I were on had to stop at JB for forever, so we decided that we'd go over to Singapore on our own, i.e., bus. We got on the bus, and it was a mistake. We got off and walked over to Singapore - yes, you can walk overseas! Hehee.. and what greeted us at the Singapore checkpoint was incredulous!!! We could not believe our eyes. The lines were massive, and so many people were pushing! We were moving along in the crowd because people were pushing us. It was SO disgusting - physically and attitude-wise. I mean, these are grown-ups! They were pushing to get in line, and there were a few people whom had this determined faces, gritting their teeth and trying to push their way through. People were getting angry and shouting around. Really mad! It really felt like we were in some uncivilized country - I honestly think many people in the crowd yesterday were so uncivilized and had disgusting attitudes. It doesn't mean that in difficult and terrible situations one can be so inconsiderate of people and push others even if it hurt them, just for their own personal benefit, seriously selfish.

Ridiculous ride as well lately. Haven't been extremely busy, but my head has been. Been trying to get some work done, but procrastination is so bad. It's a bad bad habit. I feel that I've been losing a little of my self-discipline, and it's quite maddening. I realized that my self-discipline and drive has dropped, and I sometimes feel that it has something to do with my exercise routine, among many other reasons of course. Managed to get in 2 runs this week, and I already feel differently about my work and what I've got to get going. It's quite amazing that exercise does wonders to a person. For me, it helps me get my body moving, and I don't feel my mind being so s.l..u...g....g......i.......s..........h.... It's quite stressful knowing I've got so many things to do and yet don't move my butt to do it.

Also been a ride for both JS and I - not so much a ride than a journey. A journey, yes. Good learning journey for both of us considering the circumstances we're in. He's been away close to 2 months, with a week or two in between his trips overseas. By the time he gets back in December, it'd be about 2 months. It has been a good journey for me to learn how to release and let him go. It is always difficult to, and learning to release my grip and loosen my hands has been challenging, but also rewarding. I knew I've always needed to learn to lessen my dependency on Jaeson, because it's not the healthiest way to function in a relationship, and also, my Ultimate Dependency should be on the Lord. The situation with Jaeson being away now has been a good learning curve for me.

There is a story of holding sand in your hand, where you grab a handful of sand and grip it really hard - the sand all falls through the spaces of your fingers and you lose much of the sand you're trying so hard to hold on to. However, when you relax and loosen the muscles of your hand and hold the sand loosely between your fingers, the sand has more possibility of staying on your hand. The difference lay in the way the sand was held - heavy grip, or relaxed fingers. I am so reminded that I must not hold on to the relationship so tightly that instead of it being a loving one, it's a suffocating one. Tough lesson, but must be learnt.

We're all on a journey, a journey in different aspects and situations of life. We always have much to learn from every person we meet, every situation we encounter, every phase of life, every feeling we feel, every thing we hear. The choice is ours. We cannot avoid the ride, but we can make the ride different.

Life's lessons

2007-10-24T20:48:00.000+08:00

Listening to some, or maybe most, of my clients and their concerns, I have a few varied responses. However, the 2 most common ones are, "Oh my, I see myself in them!!!" and "I do hope that I don't make these same mistakes..."

Some of the responses I have for myself so far in my inner dialogues are:

I do hope I don't become a naggy, grumpy, complaining, and negative wife to my husband in future. That's too much to deal with.
Please don't regress and think too much and let my mind be a trouble to myself.
There is no need for life to be negative; be positive!

Meanwhile, been busy with practicum and thesis. It's like, go go go go and go somemore. Picking good momentum, but somehow, also feel apprehensive of what's ahead. I finish very very soon, and then what?

I shall know soon.

A day at a time

2007-10-10T11:41:00.000+08:00

A day at a time; that's how I've been experiencing it with Jaeson with his previous overseas trip and now another trip overseas. It's kind of mad, but well, it's good. It's mad with a positive to it.

He had came back after a month plus away in China, and since I am studying during the week in Singapore, we only had a few hours with each other before I left to Singapore. Then I came back after a few days after making some schedule changes and Jaeson specially taking a day off from work, and we headed down to Mersing for a day trip. It was oh-so-fun. We just headed out to Mersing with no plans whatsoever what we were going to do. Initially we checked out the ferry/speed boats to the islands. No go, timing didn't fit. Then we drove up and down and up and down the same street along the coast, scouting for the best beach. No go, all murky or pebbly, or just not nice. So we did that for a few hours. Huhauhauha. No concrete goal achieved but it was just so nice being able to chat and chat, and just...chat, and spend time together. Finally, my Mr. Brilliant thought of kayaking to an island when we drove past some kayaks in a resort somewhere. Our mission then was to find a place where they rented out kayaks. We drove past a secluded place (I wouldn't call it a resort) where we saw the wonderful floating objects that would take us to an island; any island, just some island! This place is quiet, have some facilities together with the chalets, by the beach, and a good hangout place to relax and have some peace of mind.

This was our miracle for the day, and we headed out with our kayaks and paddled out into the ocean to go over to a nearby island. Weather was really good, thank God for no sunburn! However, as we were paddling, it started drizzling, and we paddled harder, and the winds got stronger, black clouds were gathering in front of us, and we paddled harder!!! Finally reaching a terribly stony seashore of an island, we had a great laugh over our situation. 2 people with a kayak, out in the island with no one there at all, raining, thunder and some lightning, and wondering what to do. We decided at last to go over to another island, which didn't look as stony as the previous one. Paddling hard and fast, we reached and we pushed the kayak really into the land so that it wouldn't drift away when the tide went down. That was a mistake, on hindsight.

We spent a little while on the island, me snapping pictures, Jaeson eating his potato chips, we both chatting, while sandflies feasted on us. The sandflies are no joke. They look like little specks of sand flying around. In fact, if they land on you, you'd think they were sand and not be bothered by them. But oh my goodnessssss.. They don't bother you when they bite you, but the bites DO definitely bother you after the sandflies have committed their crime and left the scene. My horrible legs, ARGH! It was SO so so so, I cannot begin to describe how itchy they were, they were so itchy. Jaeson counted his bites 3 days after the trip, and concluded that he had 40 of them all over his body. That's crazy; imagine so many areas of your body itching crazily all at once. I didn't bother counting my bites. But I do know that I've got yucky scars now, and therefore, no skirts or shorts for awhile, other than to do sports. Some of you girls on Sunday have already told me that my legs looked diseased, yesss.. I absolutely agree. It looks like I've got some terrible incurable skin disease. Yucky yuck yucks.

So anyhow, back to the kayak we dragged up to land for safety sakes. I said it was a mistake, reason being, that when we wanted to go back, our kayak was about 200metres away from the water, as it was now low tide. I mean, this heavy floating object, 200 metres away!! After laughing and laughing and more laughing, we just decided we couldn't push it for 200metres and decided to carry it. Yes, carry a kayak. It was heavy!! Plus, laughing when carrying something heavy is not helpful, so we had to stop quite a few times before getting it to the water. We laughed somemore, and decided we better get back.

It was a really great day spent. Although it was somewhat unplanned and some hitches with our activity for the day, it was a very fulfilling one. Laughing with someone you love together over something seemingly serious and wrong, will bond you closer to each other, and not to mention, the situation feeling less serious than it was. We experienced serious moments of wondering whether we went to Mersing just to have a car ride, kayaking in open waters in almost bad weather, seriously secluded island (absolutely no one on the island!! I wondered how it felt to be like Robinson Crusoe, hehe!), our 'vehicle' stranded in the middle of nowhere, etc etc. Keeping spirits up throughout these situations through enjoying the moment, laughing at ourselves, really made the day for us.

So now, it's back to being apart again. He's back to travelling, and well, we adjust and change to each other as the need arises. A day at a time.

One day, at a time.

Break

2007-09-18T17:36:00.000+08:00

I broke it today. Being pressured I tell you, is not the best way to break your dam. More here

Lifeline & Anchor

2007-09-18T17:24:00.000+08:00

Swimming and staying afloat of everything, it's mad. But it's not mad when I have my Lifeline and Anchor. It's paradoxical, having both a Lifeline and an Anchor at the same time, but it makes total sense.

Without my Lifeline or my Anchor, I'd die. I am almost dying, but I'm living. I think I am getting a little glimpse as to what Paul the Apostle meant when he was writing, "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain". In the midst of dying, I have yet to find life. Some light at the top of the ocean is visible once in a while, but I know it will be fully bright one day.

Yes, it will.

Lovely buddy

2007-09-14T17:24:00.000+08:00

Moving from acquaintances to friends, friends to good friends, good friends to even gooder friends, gooder friends to loving buddies. *grins*. Okay, loving buddies aren't what we'd call each other, but I miss my lovely buddy. I wouldn't call him lovely, neither would I call him my buddy, but oh well. Jaeson is so far off away overseas at work, and I've been downright busy with my work; practical, coursework, and the big T. So much so that 3 weeks plus just flew by. And I'm waiting for 2 weeks more to fly by so he can flyeth home quick. Quick quick quick... q u i c k. . . .

It's been an important lesson for me to learn even whilst he's away that my total dependency is not on him, but on the Author and Finisher of my life. It's easy to be overly emotionally dependent (at least it is for me) on him, as well as on my loved ones, but the reality and truth of things is that that is not the healthiest way for me, neither is it for him. We are not meant to be a god and goddess to each other. Instead, we are partners on this life's journey toward the Real God.

Sky high evening

2007-09-05T22:39:00.000+08:00

Let your hair loose, relax! Jo, Ly, and I went to the park today to run. It was good to move after so long. It's been horrible not exercising for so long. All my Sundays have been occupied with either something else or coming back to Singapore, therefore couldn't go to the field to do any sports. During the week pulak, haven't allocated the time to do such activities. Since today's a free-er day, I decided to head down to the park.

It was such fun and definitely amusing to watch the children play at the playground. It's funny how frustrated I felt just observing the way some parents treated their kids. If a parent brings the child to the playground, how about playing with the child instead of yakking on the phone all the way? But then again, maybe she had some pressing and utterly urgent needs to settle. Oh well. Also, it's so nice to see some kids taking the initiative to be parently to other kids. Also, the way some parents and children interact, so beautiful to observe. Sitting there after our run, I was wondering how come I'm working with older persons this practicum, and this thought struck me while observing this about a year old boy: old men, were once 1 year old boys too! Scary thought.

A visit to the park with swings; ah, of course me, have to have a go right? Of course the seat has got to be big enough for my butt lah. *grins* So fun!!!! Swing high-high-high! and look up into the sky!!! Felt so liberating! And we 3 sat on this sort of angled turntable/satellite dish/saucer looking thing, and went round and round and round till I was kind of giddy and nauseous. But it was utterly fun. So nice to be childlike once in a while.. I think it's worth the while allowing the little girl or boy inside you come out once in a while, and have some fun. That's something I need to learn - be like a child, and relax and be less serious and intense, have fun! Scary to think of how easy it is to lose the innocence and wonder of a child, jaded by the cares of this world.

What fun thing can I do next? :)

Noodley

2007-09-02T22:43:00.000+08:00

I am feeling like noodles. Noodley. So many feelings in me, along with so many things in my plate. Everything affects everything. It's a girl thing. Guys can separate what they're feeling from what they do and who they are. Girls can do it too, but really, in a tougher fashion as compared to guys.

All I can do is learn to relax and rest more in God's presence, while handling the noodley stuff in daily life. Teaching in YLDP about Psalm 23 and how The Shepherd provides for us by His pastures and still waters, I myself have got to learn the important lesson of not being in want, and to find my rest by His pastures, and His still waters.

Welcome to the hood

2007-08-21T19:50:00.000+08:00

Adulthood.

It's been a hectic month, with no sight of the end of the hecticity. Whatever hecticity means. I've started on my new semester with a (demanding) subject, practicum, and a (demanding) thesis. Graduate school is taking me to my limits of organizational skills. I am overwhelmed in terms of the number of things that need to be done, at the SAME time. !!!. So, yes. I have been stressed. Add to that, I am sad too, that Jaeson will be flying overseas tomorrow for work for a month or two. *sob

But, I am trying to see all these things from a perspective of it being preparation for taking on more responsibilities as an adult, otherwise I'd never grow up (properly). Growing up in age, also should mean growing up in responsibility. Unfortunately that's not so with many adults. I do not want to land up in that category, therefore, it's a good time now to learn better time management skills, organizational skills, and to focus. FOCUS!

As a destressing activity, I decided to give myself a chance at a new look. So....I cut my hair. Short. Hah.

Back to schwork

2007-08-01T18:15:00.000+08:00

Been awhile of not posting; hence the long post today. I've not even typed it all yet and I can predict it's gonna be a long one (this goes to proof my great abilities of mind-reading, Gid. Hauahauhauha! Okay, rubbish aside)

Seemed as though July was a long month for me, contrary to what I've been feeling for the whole year up to June. Prolly due to the fact that I was on holiday and not doing as much as what I was doing prior to the hols. Anyhow, it was a good break, and it's time to go back to school again. This time, for the final semester.

I've been so wonderfully provided for in going to my second practicum site - an elderly site. Yup, total opposite of what I did in my first prac, [delinquent] youths. I desperately needed a site that would provide me samples of elderly clients due to the fact that my thesis is on elderly issues. The idea was to use my practicum clients as samples for my thesis research. Thank God for this opportunity and the chance to be in this organization called SAGE - Singapore Action Group for the Elderly.

The amazing part of this whole (Godly) arrangement was that my site supervisor is such a nice and kind man, and my [so to speak] colleagues, are nice people. I feel belonged and that I am taken seriously as a training psychologist. The site director and staff oriented a new staff and myself, showing us around, introduced everyone to us, showed us what to do, spoke to us regarding casework and professional development, etc. It feels really good to be treated as part of the organization even though you're not formally employed as a staff there. I am really thankful that I am placed in this site.

On top of my new practicum site, I've also got a new supervisor. Met him once for an interview (yes, he interviews students before taking them on!) and I already know that he will be a good supervisor and that he will be very much a part of my personal and professional growth. He asked a lot of questions, many of which I couldn't answer, and one of which was this: "Why are you in this profession?" His reason for asking this was to seek out my motivation for working in this field, and if I did not know my motivation, then it was trouble. By the way, the answer is not "so that I can help people". I answered that at first, and he asks me again, "but why?" I didn't know why. He gave me the assignment of taking that as food for thought, and do a write up for him. Thought so hard for many days, and I think I know why now, but that's a different topic altogether.

It's been a short journey of being in the people helping profession and I sometimes ask myself whether I can weather the ride. It is really true that personal issues get in the way of being a better people helper. I mentioned that I think I know why I am in this profession, and it's largely due to my own personal issues, and seriously, the emotional roller coaster that I was on throughout the first practicum, largely, if not all, was due to the same personal issue. I am still processing through the first practicum in light of it highlighting my personal ugly self, and I am afraid of the second practicum, due to the fact that my Mandarin and Chinese dialects are nowhere near fluent and that I will be dealing with such an unfamiliar population. Still in the process of processing. Yes, redundant, I know.

Being in the people helping profession, I've got to help myself first. Even if I don't land up doing what I am doing now, I would say that I am still thankful that I am doing what I am doing now for the reason that I am getting to see myself in a different light, and that I would never get to experience what I'm doing now and change. It's the process of being refined and changed to be like Christ as what we are called to be, of being fine gold. I'm grateful, I'm thankful.

Japanese Tetris

2007-07-18T17:15:00.000+08:00

Thanks to Lipoh, get ready for some laughs! It's hilarious!

Of durians and such

2007-07-13T10:30:00.000+08:00

Been having quite a bit of durians. We have a tree in our backyard, and it's fruiting like mad. Just the not so nice fruits, that's all. We can open like 15-20 fruits, and eat about 1 okaaaayyy one and perhaps 1 better-than-okay one. Despite that, we've had some pretty good durian sessions (bought and some kind souls gave us some) and the results of it? Heaty body, sore throat, runny nose and feeling like some rich foods have invaded my body to make it fat. It's a fat feeling. But of course, apple cider vinegar and honey is the remedy for all such ailments. What would we do without it? =)

Wanna take a walk?

2007-07-07T09:25:00.000+08:00

It was so aptly put when Dad said that "young people nowadays don't want to walk the journey". This was said over a chat about future career options, and what I'd like to do after graduating from my programme.

I admitted to my dad that I might have a problem regarding what to do, as it might not be directly related to what I am studying now, and if that is so, then the next question to ask would be: then what would I want to do? Answer: I don't know.

With my experience, I'm merely another fresh graduate, in a sense. I most likely would have to start from the bottom doing simple things, and when I've gained more experience then branch into different areas. But the most important thing is that I've got to start somewhere, and I have to walk the journey of learning. I can't land up doing some idealistic thing when I haven't learnt the ropes from the roots. It's a journey of learning that nothing comes overnight; nothing is automatic.

Beautiful day

2007-07-04T22:13:00.000+08:00

Eventful day today! First off, it's Ly's graduation, congrats dearie Ly! So Dad and Mum and the whole sisterhood came down to sg to celebrate with her; and not to mention we had a crazily full dinner. Groaaan. I think I ate too much. I think we all ate too much.

She's now a full fledged nurse - anyone with any sakit sakit, can go consult her and seek her or services. And miss Ly, for anyone doing that, please remember my advertising services. It's not too expensive la :P

Amazing how fast time flies. I remember her going off to Singapore; I spent the first night in this land with her while I was on holidays back from Australia, and boy, she was a teeny weeny girly then. But she's grown to be a fine young lady today, a staff nurse. Whoa. 3 whole years. Anyone seeking to be a nurse, approach her. She can tell you lots of stories and be an inspiration to you.

Secondly, my dearie boyfriend is on the way back, flying over the oceans right this moment I'm typing this. I'm so excited!!! He's been away in quite a few different parts of China and his schedule's been changed quite a few times, and at last the final change was really final and now he's on the way back. So am waiting for time now, doing some packing up and heading off to the airport to greet-eth the darling and back-eth to Malaysia. Sweet.

Refif what?

2007-07-01T23:41:00.000+08:00

Was walking with mum and Pris and we saw a shop banner for Foot Refifxology.

Now, you tell me what is that! Had a good laugh la. Haiyoo...things people do.

Too cute!

2007-06-27T13:33:00.001+08:00

So I am at the laptop inside the room doing my stuff, when I get an email from my lovely landlady asking if Ly and I wanna go for a swim with her. I laugh when I see that email because she's only about 4 meters away from me, both of us separated by the locked door of my room. Huahuahuah!

I guess it's about the excitement of having a computer fixed up with the internet and learning to use the net; too cute!I was "consulted" about how to use the internet, send emails, etc etc etc.

She's a really lovely landlady. We're really blessed to have her as our landlady. She is as caring as a mother, and she's concerned, watches out for us, chats, and she's just a very pleasant person. Plus, she's really cute; her mannerisms I mean. We thank God for her.

Near completed status

2007-06-27T10:47:00.001+08:00

I officially finish my practicum sesh at the home today (provided the girls appear). I've got only 2 more hours to clock and it's a mixture of feelings.

Hmmm...

I can't imagine that I've gone through this - with all it's emotional ups and downs, and wow, I stand amazed because God has been with me through it all. I did a final closure sesh with some girls on Monday and their reactions and feedback towards the sessions I had with them were somewhat a pleasant surprise! All except one were kinda sad that it was ending; I mean, I was surprised because all these while, they've been grousing and grumbling about coming to see a psychologist and then at the end of it, they say that they would feel a difference without me coming in to see them anymore because then they'd have a loss of someone they can talk to.

When I talked over this with my supervisor, he told me the exact same thing that he had told me before when I first started out with this prac stint. Read more here

"You mean...

2007-06-25T23:43:00.000+08:00

...that pychologists can read people's minds? You know what I'm thinking now?" quips my client.
"No" (!!!!)

Read more here

Calm me now

2007-06-22T08:59:00.000+08:00

I sit . . .
Think.
Anger and frustration come forth

Should I?
Not?
Calm sweeps over my soul
With you

Oh Lord.

People 101 - on hindsight

2007-06-21T16:57:00.000+08:00

Got my hands on a book belonging to Jaes - such valuable stuff. It's called "Winning with People" by John Maxwell. I read the first few pages and already was learning stuff from those few pages; hence, the decision to post some lessons learnt from them.

Believe it or not, I used to think (in my younger days) that I was so great with people. How foolish to have prided myself in such thoughts, and I now look back and think that it might perhaps be true, only to the extent of being great with people superficially. A little hi, and bye, and some meaningless conversation in between the two, and nothing else after that.

First and second chapter of the book was regarding looking inwardly toward myself and assessing my own inadequacies and views regarding relationships and people. The Lens Principle: Who we are determines how we see others, and The Mirror Principle: The first person we must examine is ourselves. Some excerpts from the book;

"The way you view others is determined by who you are.....If you don't like people, that really is a statement about you and the way you look at people. Your viewpoint is the problem. If that's the case, don't try to change others. Don't even focus on others; focus on yourself. If you change yourself and become the kind of person you desire to be, you will begin to view others in a whole new light..."

I have always been aware of my discomfort regarding making new relationships in the hope of making them last. There's a subconscious thing within me that holds me back from developing new meaningful relationships and thus, I choose to stick with the familiar - people I am comfortable with and close to. I am not saying it's not good, but I am not also saying that I shouldn't change for the better.

I have considered and thought about it, and have come to a [painful] realization that the way I have viewed and perceived the idea of relationships affects the way I handle and treat relationships. I fear rejection, and thus reduce my chances of being rejected if I limit my relationships to a handful of familiar people. It's like a "safety measure" for myself. I must say that it does not only affect my personal life, but also my professional life. I feel fear and apprehension when I think about whether I'm succeeding in a people-oriented profession, when I think about the glaring eyes and emotional people that I have to face at work.

Yes, my perceptions have most likely been shaped by my own experiences - many not within my control. But, I have a choice to determine my perception and attitude regarding relationships before I can go on to develop good relationships with others.

The book provides questions to ask ourselves at the beginning of the chapters and I leave them with you:

What is my perception of others? (others being relationships, and people)
Have I examined myself and taken responsibility for who I am?

I asked these questions myself, and know that before I can go on to be winning with people, I had better win with myself first.

Growing pains

2007-06-20T00:22:00.001+08:00

"Habits of ineffectiveness: Quick-fix, short-term thinking. In school many of us procrastinate and then successfully cram for tests. But does cramming work on a farm? Can you go two weeks without milking the cow and then get out there and milk like crazy? Can you "forget" to plant in the spring or goof off all summer and then hit the ground real hard in the fall to bring in the harvest?"

Speaking to myself regarding such habits leading to ineffectiveness. Planning based on principles of life needs to be in place. How so very often many of us live life without planning, and let life take us wherever it does. Am approaching the ripe old age of mid-century-ness, and it strikes me that if I'm not going to plan and see a vision for my life, I think alot of life will be wasted fumbling around getting somewhere, don't know where. Saw a list of habits of ineffective people, so many were true of me:

Be reactive: doubt yourself and blame others
Work without any clear end in mind
Do the urgent thing first
Think win/lose
Seek first to be understood
If you can't win, compromise
Fear change and put off improvement

Growing up is both physical and mental. Like dad always says, grow old and grow up. Not just older, but mature(r). Scary ain't it? It's much easier for myself to let life take its course and let things happen, but I know that that would not be much of a life when I reach 60 and look back at how unproductive and careless I was with life. Painful process, growing up. But, necessary. I sometimes let myself flow along, and then when I am reminded, I go oh-oh. Turning into an adult in terms of numbers is easy. Turning into an adult in reality is a different story altogether.

Training for the journey of life

2007-06-17T20:32:00.001+08:00

Managed to get in a run today; haven't been doing so for a while now. Although I had initially reluctantly willed myself to get a run in after so long, I felt really good perspiring and working the muscles and lethargy out from my bod. Phew.

It's not that I particularly luuuurrrvveee running. I do it to develop self-discipline and endurance. I do it to train my body and also my mind. As I had written in a previous post, I use running to develop personal discipline and endurance, and of for health reasons! =) I am of the opinion that the way you train yourself for a sport reflects how you will react and behave towards circumstances in your life as well. Therefore, when I feeleth the lazy-bones-bug catching up with me, I will myself to geteth into action physically, to 'primeth' myself and to traineth myself to not let laziness get a hold of me - whether sports wise, or responsibility wise. It's related.

Meanwhile, Uncle Woon just told me about a 10k run coming up on the 26th of August in conjunction with National Day. Anyone interested to train together this run? ;)

Distance: 2.22km
Timing: 25mins 03secs

Babar the Elephant

2007-06-17T19:51:00.000+08:00

It's weird how suddenly you remember cartoons from your childhood, as what happened this afternoon. A few of us were driving along in the car and suddenly Paulus shouts from his seat, "Hey, BBR! It means____" (I will not bother to say what he said for dear Paulus' sake, but those in the car were shocked, oh well. Hah). But for me, BBR (the car plate letters) reminded me of Babar the Elephant! That was a lovely cartoon to watch; sadly not one of them in the car remembers it. Hmph. It must only mean one thing - my cartoons and theirs are of a different era. Gulp. Age factor. *grrooaaannn*

Presenting to you dear Babar the Elephant:

Do you guys remember Babar now??

Missing...

2007-06-14T23:01:00.000+08:00

...the boyfriend. Jaes is dearly missed while he's away for work overseas - thankfully not for a few months like before. He was supposed to be back today, but he got held up and couldn't get back today due to work.

The phone and internet and of course initiative to use these means of course helps with the distance not only for these sort of short overseas trips, but also has always been a means for us - specially in the days of my being in Australia, and his many trips for work, sometimes dragging for long periods.

It was lovely also that before he left he had made me dinner one of the nights, and it was just lovely spending time with each other doing simple things like eating home cooked food (done by him), and washing up, etc etc. What made it all special was that he was doing it in making up to me for his busyness due to work and some plans we had to cancel due to work too. Huahua, I had to meddle around in his kitchen, and he told me to just go out and wait for the dinner to appear. So ok lah. I think it's easier to not meddle when the action is happening somewhere else, than to try avoiding meddling while looking into the action. Girls, don't meddle around with his plans when your man wants to do something for you. Guys, do something for your girls. Hee hee. Contented.

Sourcing talent

2007-06-14T21:27:00.000+08:00

I've been watching the different videos on youtube, it'd be impossible to put them all up here; I am so amazed by so many different talents! Almost reduced me to tears, some of them, and I think it's the kiddies one that move me the most. It's just the children. Now, I'm just waiting for Jit and Lipoh's little girly to come sooooonnnnn!!!!

Was reminded about the parable of the talents and how we should take heed and use the talents God has given us. All of us have talents - not just singing, playing, dancing, clapping, etc etc..can be anything at all! I've heard people say that they're not good in anything, but I think the focus is not whether they have got talents or not, but rather, finding out where that talent lies. Most people don't know what their strengths are and thus conclude that they aren't good in anything. A bigger possibility is that their strengths and potential have not been tapped into yet.

Work in progress

2007-06-13T20:06:00.000+08:00

Good job, good job. I got my nomination for my thesis supervisor done up, and wrote something up for my supervisor in a few hours, when she thought I'd be doing it for two weeks. Whhheeeee!! Am really happy with myself, and right now, I just need a massage. Bending over the keyboard for too many hours makes my neck scream in pain. I don't know how people work at computers the whole day for the whole of their lives! Amazing feats of the physical body :P

I'm almost finishing my practicum. C'mmoooonn, I can do it!! I honestly have learnt alot from this few months of prac, but wheww.. it's really draining. It's just the worst case scenario when you know your clients are so not excited to see you, but you have to go because they're assigned to you. So, then comes the art of dealing with people who don't really like seeing you, but have to be with you anyway. Well, as my friend put it, she can't wait for the prac to end to have a REAL holiday. I know what she means. I'm technically on semester holidays, but not really on holiday coz I have to go for pracs still. It's ok, it's coming to an end, aaannnddd, I've got a new semester coming up, with a new prac site. Wheee!

Have been dealing with arrangements for prac, thesis, work, etc etc. that I've been thinking what if this, what if that, and what if's all over. Emotionally tiring to think of back-up plans in case things don't work out, but I've been reminded many, many times that God is in control. He's been reminding me of the many times that I've worried about something, and at the end of the day, I didn't have to worry after all coz everything worked out fine. It's getting easier these days to trust in that, and have the assurance that God has the best plan. As what someone I know always says, "it is only God's Hands upon it", and I echo that too. My physical work is progressing, my emotional side is progressing too, and yes, faith also progressing. We are all works in progress.

Sobs. Wow!

2007-06-13T19:48:00.000+08:00

Got this off someone's blog I frequent; her comment was that it reduced her to tears. I watched it rather skeptically at first, thinking what is this soapy thingy - don't play play, I almost cried. Watch it for yourself and be woweddd!

2 June 2007...

2007-06-11T16:33:00.000+08:00

...was of course Sam and Vicky's wedding. Simple, beautiful, loving. It was just beautiful seeing both our good friends tying the knot with each other and exchanging vows to love till death do them part. Was also lovely meeting old friends, and seeing people I've not seen in ages - particularly from days in Brisbane when Vicky and I with others were in the same church; but haiya, didn't get pictures with them.. Wheeeeww. Those were some days. Ok, enough said; piccies!

A summary of the day's happenings. Both Jaes and I went to Sam's and Vicky's places, respectively to be their 'aides' in the Chinese customs - they had that more for fun than anything else, really! And it was indeeeeeed fun seeing how Sam had to bargain his way in to Vicky's house to claim his beautiful bride. hee hee. And my dear boy had to drink some blob of pureed bittergourd to help Sam out. Hauhauhauha!! So anyhow, Sam eventually went through all the obstacles and got to his bride triumphantly, and they got married. Hee hee!

We had a good time catching up with some friends...

And lastly, I must say this before I put this up, I absolutely love our smiles on that day. Hhauhauhauhauha!!! I was so happy with the way we looked! My sisters would call me perasan and full of myself, but oh well! And yes, I've juuuust learnt how to use picasa (don't you dare lauggghh!) and these are the results of my experiments. And yes, my dearie boy is in two of my favourite shirts of him - yes I have favourites of his clothings too! Ho ho ho!

The glass castle

2007-06-01T13:55:00.000+08:00

I've just finished another memoir - The Glass Castle - of a girl, now a woman, whom had a really rough life with her family, but now living in a stable home with her husband and children. Her parents were to me, not the ideal of what many might view to be good parents (others might beg to differ) and they were always moving around doing the skedaddle (as Jeannette Walls used the term in her book). Yet through the seeming neglect and impoverishment, they turned out well. Jeannette Walls turned out well. She did exceptionally well in school and was able to read and write excellently, eventually becoming a writer and journalist - see the review here

I think to myself and decide that though many people might insist on the effect of environment upon the individual's life circumstances, it is also the individual's make up and choices that make the person who s/he is. Jeannette Walls could have stayed destitute and in her sad conditions of life, blaming her parents on "making" her who she was, but she took the first step in getting out of that life and making things work for herself, instead of waiting for something to happen while blaming her parents and circumstances in life. We all have choices in life, for which we are responsible for.

Instead of waiting around and blaming others and circumstances for where we are at, why not pluck up the courage and make some decisions that might change your life? It's definitely not easy, as speaking from experience, and the risk sometimes might be so great; but the rewards and gains might be far richer than where you are at. Choices...

KL in brief

2007-05-31T00:18:00.000+08:00

The KL trip over the weekend was indeed eventful. Friday night was Isaac's graduation from his 3-month at Tung Ling Bible School - so proud of you, Isaac. Saturday was hangout day with Jaeson's parents, meetup and sleepover with ex-gang (ho ho), and Sunday continuation of meetup, church and going home.

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Saturday with Jaeson's parents: We had a lazy morn, and heavy lunch, and went to his dad's workplace - Nissan production factory. I promise you, you'll never look at cars the same way again (as Merv so aptly put it!!). We were brought to the production floor of Nissan cars and vans, from the beginning of the car body to the paintwork, to the end of the production of a car. We all had to put on protective helmets, we looked so funnnnnyyy!!! Plus, the helmet really made our hair so flat. But anyhow, seeing how cars are made was really interesting. I really enjoyed that "tour", plus Jaes' dad was really good in answering my [many many many] questions and explaining the processes very nicely.

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Meeting up with my ex-gang - no, NOT my fighting one, (I tell you about my fighting one another day) it's my girly one - from days of Convent school, mannnnn. We've not met as one group together since forever ago, and it was just great to get back together again. It didn't feel as though we've not met since high school, which was erm.. LONG ago!! Crazy laughter and free sharing, just fooling about with each other, sigh. It was really nice to meet and catch up with each other, the comfort of old friends, and having fond memories. However, as we were reminded by my dearie boy, we shouldn't stop at reliving past fond memories but continue with the friendship in the present. Friendships aren't only about the past memories, but also the sharing of present experiences that help gel us together. Cheers to the 4Ts - a corny name we came up while in high school for ourselves - the initials of our 4 surnames. Ho ho hooooo!!!

Fell and feel

2007-05-23T16:09:00.001+08:00

I fell down on the stairs. My worst nightmare for going on any stairs. I always imagine people following behind me and then tripping me up or down, or myself slipping because of my shoes or slippers, or my clothes tripping me up, and then I'll have super big and deep gashes; but worse than that, major embarassment!!! Today, I felt exactly that. I fell forward while walking up the stairs, and I imagine myself to look so horridly and totally non-graceful, bag and all falling all over the place. ARgh! I felt so, so embarassed. But the funny thing is, how could I feel embarassed when there was no one around? I looked around immediately to see if there was anyone who had seen my wonderful performance, but no! And yet I felt terribly embarassed. It's funny how we human being feel things when it's not even warranted. Sometimes we feel embarassed when there's no reason to feel so. Sometimes we feel mad when there's also no reason at all to feel so. Sometimes we kick a big fuss [just like me] when there's no reason to do so. And then on hindsight, we feel so silly feeling those feelings that we think that we made a fool out of ourselves. Bleh.

And no, I don't feel embarassed knowing that you know that I fell down the stairs. But, I would have been embarassed if you were there. Ho ho.

Help, Oh God

2007-05-22T23:38:00.000+08:00

God, help. I am met with sorrow in my heart for a someone dear to my heart who is at a point of desperation in life. It's heartbreaking facing point blank rejection - from your own flesh and blood.

I was asked serious life questions; thought really hard before answering them. I [literally] shook when asked to give a statement on "if you only had one thing to say to me, what would it be". I knew my answer deep in my heart: Jesus is The Way, The Truth, and The Life. I was so stumped by my fear in wanting to say that.

And I asked my dear friend back "have I been living the life of what I believe in?" - I was so afraid of the answer. And no matter what the answer she gave me, it was a reminder to myself that people around us are being affected by how we live our lives. If people know what we believe in and yet experience us and our lives differently from our beliefs, they will trust the actions more than the words we utter. Our lives have a deeper effect on people around us than we care to admit. May the Holy Spirit be our Constant Companion in this impossible journey of life.

What do I need to do right now with a friend in need? Pray. Read the Word of God like never before because an unbeliever might question me and I must have a ready answer for him/her, as what the Apostle Peter said in one of his letters. Pray. And pray somemore.

Do you have a friend who is in need? Pray. Dig into God's Words so you will have a ready answer for your friend who asks questions. Pray. And pray somemore.

Sickening

2007-05-17T22:33:00.000+08:00

I was on the way home from work just now and this guy came up the bus with his friends, still in their school uniforms at 10pm at night (!?!?) He had some exchange of words with the bus driver, and then before taking his seat, he gave the driver the finger and said "F*** YOU!". I felt so angry with him! Even if one is angry, that does not warrant s/he being rude and sickeningly vulgar!

The driver was looking in the mirror, driving the bus, and I don't know what this rude guy was doing at the back, the driver said ".....I'll call police ah!" and the guys shouts so loudly (!) something I couldn't decipher. And he got down from the bus [somewhere near my place] and before the driver drove off, this guy got the chance to go to the front door and gave his finger again and his vulgarities. I'm so sickened. And actually, I was afraid and feeling a little scared, wondering if the guy was going to be violent and do something in the bus. It's one thing to work with juvenile delinquents who are so vulgar - every sentence is punctuated with vulgarities - and another to encounter a stranger shouting vulgarities at another stranger. So sick.

Being vulgar toward another person is not respecting the other person. And being vulgar when one is angry is certainly not acceptable. Learning to express one's anger in a more adaptive and healthy way is important. I've met so many people who can't express their anger, and their other emotions in a healthy way, and land up doing silly things to themselves. I've had the horrible "honour" of seeing my client's thigh full of penknife cuts - probably about 50 cuts - because she couldn't express her frustration and anger. Is that necessary? Is cutting the only way to express hurt and anger? Is using vulgarities the way to show one's anger toward something or someone?

No.

Prescriptions for rose tinted glasses, anyone?

2007-05-15T10:19:00.000+08:00

The glasses we use to view life will affect the way we react to life and situations. I have been thinking about certain ways I react to situations, and pondered about it - realizing that the way I react is many times a reflection of how I view the situation, and probably my outlook in life.

If we view life and the situations and people that come along as "out to get me!!!", you'll be defensive and on guard almost always.

If we view life and the situations and people that come along as "an opportunity for something good", you'll be jumping with excitement many times.

If we view life and the situations and people that come along as "___________", you'll be "__________" (fill in the blanks for yourself..)

The view we take in life will affect our reactions. Our reactions will in turn affect our behaviour. Scary, but very true.

Friend of old times

2007-05-10T23:10:00.000+08:00

Got a phone call a week or so ago, and asked for Eunice Tang. Erm. No one calls me on our home phone, except for the occasional church or YF stuff phone call. But someone calling me on our home phone asking for Eunice Tang is not normal. I paused, and after 2 seconds, go, "Tay Ju Lee!!!!!!!!" Shrieking on top of my voice and shouting her name, I think she had a great ear shock.

Anyways, she's a great good friend after years and years of friendship since primary 1. ARGH! That was AGES ago. She is now back from the States for holidays, and will be going back there again for school. It's incredible how some friendships still stay the same, even after long periods of not meeting and talking. There are some friends where even through the distance and lack of contact, you still connect. I don't have many of such friends, for which I am thankful for this great girl. After putting the phone down, gobbling down my dinner, and having a quick bath, I shot over to her place, and it felt like... whoa. Just like before! So good to have a friend back, even if it's for a short wee while.

Friendships sometimes can last the physical distance, and lack of contact. But some friendships don't. They just fade away, and when that happens, one just has to accept it and move on witih other relationships in life. I guess each one of us have friends that we can put into either the first or the second category. But for myself and Jules, our friendship's in the first category; I'm glad for that. It's nice to know that even after years of going through life, you've got a friend who knows you well enough to well...know you.

My sister's keeper

2007-05-10T20:27:00.001+08:00

So I was supposed to meet my supervisor at this place for supervision, and realized that it was Singapore Council of Women's Organization building. I was early by more than half an hour (GASP!! here, you start applauding me for being superbly on time!!!) and so decided to walk around the premises. What did I find than a little hsop they have that they sell recycled good. Ohh..I felt so gleeful thinking what little treasures I could find in there.

Walked and browsed through the stuff; they had clothings, toys, shoes, books, etc etc etc. After looking at many things, I started on the books. I found some rather nice ones for presents, and, I suddenly saw a familiar "J" peering out at me from the spine of a book. Excitedly, I pulled away the books blocking that particular book, and lo and behold!!!! It was a book that I've been wanting to get my hands on for just ages!!! It was Jodi Picoult's book: My Sister's Keeper. I've read some reviews on it, and have been since trying to borrow it from the library, but to no success. And here it was, and it is now mine - for only $3SGD!!!!! YOhhhhhhoooooooo!!!!! Anyone of you can borrow it when I'm done with it. It's a little worn, and looks owned before, but I don't mind! That really made my day. Oh so lovelyyyy.. I had another book that I've been so wanting to get been provided for too - which also did make my day. God is so good!! He's indeed our Provider.

On another note, I was reading the book of Judges where there was the recount of how God repaid the evildoings done to Gideon even after Gideon had done wonderful things for the people of Israel. I am reminded again of how God is faithful in looking out for us when evil has come upon us - "Vengeance is Mine". But this I am challenged about: Gideon had already died when God brought about His vengeance; am I willing to forgive and trust that God will do what He says in the knowledge that God might not do it when I am still alive? That's tough. It's a lifelong thing to experience firsthand that God will be our Faithful Keeper, may we be constantly reminded of that.

Yay!!

2007-05-04T11:27:00.000+08:00

On our trip to KL this time, I acquired a pedometer, courtesy of Jaes' dad. Hee hee =D What's a pedometer?

So what can I do with a newly acquired pedometer? Run of course! =D
Hit the roads yesterday (with my player of course tooo...!) and was so happy running, and was really excited to see how far and how fast I went. Couldn't wait to get back home so I can see how much I'd clocked!

Distance: 3.25km
Timing: 34mins 35secs

Wheeee!!

Not much, I know...but it was an achievement for myself to do that, since I never knew how much and how fast I was running. There is a thingy here that measures the speed, but it fluctuates according to the speed that I am currently running at that point of time, hmmm.. Also, the roads were a little hilly, and not flat, so I huffing and puffing up the hills, and then trying to control my leggies when I was running downhill. Oh boy.. my bod is hurting today. Huahuhuaa!!! But honestly feels so good to wake up knowing that I did a workout of some sort yesterday.

Jaeson and I may hit the pool tonight, we'll see =D Or else....golfing, anyone?

Pheeewww..

2007-05-01T23:15:00.000+08:00

Oh what absence. I've been sick, and on the road to recovery, so stresssssed and still recovering and getting a break, and what nots.

It was a loooooong week - had practical and was not well at all. Had a bout of flu and was so lethargic and energy-less! It was really frustrating to have a nose running and sneezing all the time, a splitting headache, painful joints, and feeling like I just wanted to blah. On top of that, I had stuff to complete, shift some heavy [dusty] stuff my our room in Sg, write reports, make phone calls, etc etc etc. No end. Even lying on the bed was not real rest, because my mind was so active with much thoughts. It's crazy. I told myself that I was going to get a rest. A break, which brings me to the reason I'm in KL now.

Jaeson took the long weekend to come back to his parents, and so I came along. He'd come up earlier, I a day later on my own, after celebrating Ly's birthday in Klg. Ho ho, we had a little surprise with some people shouting and then singing happy birthday to her, and then she jumping out of bed like she'd just heard some ghosts singing to her or something. HAHAA!!!! But it was great fun having Isaac, Merv and Mich over and chatting till almost 2am - not to mention the amount of [loud] laughter there was. Thank goodness our home has some distance between us and the neighbours.

I'm writing this from Jaes' parents' place in KL. Told myself that this would be a totally let-myself-rest time. It has been a great 2 days so far, and tomorrow we're going back with Dad after he has his meeting downtown in KL. Have been spending time with Jaes' parents, and of course with him, and ho ho, having great, great food!! I have been reminded that it's important to slow down to well, slow down, and of course to reflect. I was doing some thinking and reflection on the way up to KL, and I miss the times when I had time to just reflect on things. I find myself losing my 'centre' if I don't do this, and don't feel good at all without this consistent practice, for which I am thankful for, because it warns me to slow down and not just go through the motions of life meaninglessly and by rote. We all need reminders from time to time to s.l.o.w. d.o.w.n... *relakkkksss............*

Just for the fun of it...!!

2007-04-19T22:55:00.000+08:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Saw this on Jo's blog and thought I'd just do this for fun..ho ho ho..

Reality bites

2007-04-19T22:21:00.000+08:00

I had trouble trying to focus at prac today. I was plagued with much personal trouble, and I was so heavy hearted on the way to work. I was so tempted to call in and say I couldn't make it, but that would be so irritatingly irresponsible.

Spoke sternly to myself, gathered up all I had within me and started with my sessions with clients; and you know what, I am reminded of how good it is to just get my mind off myself, my oh-so-many-times-selfish self, and focus on others; and after that feel so, incredibly much better. The problem is still there, but it doesn't plague me as much. It troubles me, it makes me feel sad, but I don't feel overwhelmed by it, because I've taken my eyes off myself, taken the bulk of my emotions toward myself and given it to others through empathy for their life stories. How good it feels to be able to get my eyes off myself and then focus on others. I guess this is how is works when we worship God even though we feel the horrible feelings within us because of discouraging circumstances. It takes making a decision, a resolute decision to do what we have to because it is the right thing to do, not because we feeeeeel like doing it. Feelings are just momentary, but decisions are solid. Emotions don't keep commitments, decisions do (as cited in Lydia Tang's mobile phone's outbox, 2007) (she commanded me to cite this, how dare I defy such orders) (she says she would be famous due to this quote) (please help her out).

Other side of reality is when one needs to face up to real personal issues, painful, deep issues, and not avoid it. More here

Meanwhile, have a good day everyone!

Verbal diarrhea

2007-04-19T00:12:00.000+08:00

It was crazy today at group counselling. Everyone was talking and talking and talking. Good? No. They were talking irrelevant stuff, and my partner and I couldn't stop them properly. Tiring day. More here

Move it

2007-04-18T11:12:00.000+08:00

I went running yesterday, it felt good. Haven't been running in a long while! Did the loop at the park, and sprinted at a particular stretch. Did that for a few times; didn't know how much I ran though...but it was for about 19++ minutes. I was thinking of joining the NB run in May, buttt..ho ho, didn't take the challenge up. Maybe I just need to be consistent for now first. It helped that my little gadget was working well yesterday for my run.

Effects of it was felt today when I woke up: legs and arms aching! Must be the sprints. But the workout and sweat was really good...! Yeeeehaaa! I felt much better after the run, coz my body had been feeling so lethargic, and my mind, ho. There's been much I've got to think about, and running gave me some time off to just relax.

Well, with the semester just ended, I think I might have more time for exercise, since I don't have to go to classes anymore. I think I haven't been managing my time very well, hence the delay in some of my work. It's time to pull my socks up, though I very much want a break. Welliie-dooooo-dah-dayyyy! Have a great day!

So fast!

2007-04-18T00:08:00.000+08:00

I finished the last of my modules for my masters program. Whoa. Well, save for the last paper I am supposed to hand in coming Monday, I am done already. A few of our friends are crossing fingers to get into a module next semester; but...looking a little bleak, coz there's limited space in that. Oh well.

I don't feel as though my sem has ended. There's my prac to finish, and my thesis! Gotta get that going, and moving along. Also, there's next semester's practical to think about too. Whoa.. too fast. Got to slow down, take deep breaths, and relax.

Needing a holiday, I do!

happy piggy

2007-04-12T14:30:00.000+08:00

smile

2007-04-12T13:59:00.000+08:00

I have a scary face. Or a fierce face. Hm. My friend doing prac at the same place as me smsed me today saying that one of my clients had told her that I looked fierce during our group counselling session yesterday, and the client told her to tell me. Not that it's anything surprising to me, coz I have been getting this feedback for oh-so-many times...it's countless. Sometimes it gets frustrating because I get misunderstood to be angry (which I am so not), irritated (which also I'm not), proud (ooooh no!!!), ice-queen (!?!??), and whatever nots.

Jaeson suggested practicing smiling and smiling, and practice having a pleasant face. So I tried, and succeeded for a while...but obviously not yesterday. Sob.

I practiced my smiling face again just now while on the way back.

I am smiling while I'm writing now.

Please remind me to smile when I don't look like I'm smiley =) =) =)